Yolnta Gigasa

[Nor'baal]

*sigh*


Allow me to rephrase.

Of the several billion Hutts in the galaxy, a great few of them love their children. Those who do, such as those mentioned by Ush, do not feel 'love' in the sense that is defined by Humans.

 

[Green Ranger]

Split the character bios up into two threads, Tak. Thanks.

 

[Rector_Ras]

eek meeting the bare minimum for a profile and having 2 chars in there idk if that will fly. I really dont know much about ether of them after reading it all

 

[Darth Tak]

I will expand some-time today.

 

[Cassanova]

I will expand some-time today.

The request wasn't to expand them, Tak. Per Boli, you will need to split the two characters apart, and they will each need to meet the minimum requirements on their own merits.

Split the character bios up into two threads, Tak. Thanks.

 

[Just Matt Now]

Also, he is not a Hutt. The tag "Indie" would define him correctly.

EDIT: You have been told. A child, let alone baby, has no place in the Hutt Cartel.

 

[Darth Tak]

Split in two? I'm too lazy. How about I just make it Yolnta and no Acegik?

 

[Maxx]

Then you would be good as long as it meets minimum requirements.

 

[Darth Tak]

Ok. Updates Today.

 

[Just Matt Now]

Keep in mind that you need to cover the history of your character in depth if you want to be accepted to the Cartel.

 

[Nor'baal]

You can PM it to me, and I can have a look if you like Tak.

 

[Darth Tak]

EDITED! One character.

 

[Dóiteán]

HEIGHT: As tall as Jabba
WEIGHT: Help…. How much?
DISTINGUISHING MARKS: Fatness
CONSTITUTION:9/10
STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES: +Deals -Extremely Lazy
DROIDS: Yolnta owns a B2 Battle Droid Factory, and has at least a dozen of them following him at all times.
BIOGRAPHY: Not a very well known Hutt, Yolnta was born into a rich family with a lot of expectations of him, but he failed them and wished to get Acegik to continue the glorious Legacy. Throughout his career, Yolnta has organised three bank robberies, seven jewelry stores and funded a hacking campaign.

Height- measurement
Weight- they are around a ton
Fatness isn't a distinguishing mark.
Hutts aren't very health so constitution should be lower
What kind of deals?
Not sure a factory is allowed
What happened during those robberies?

 

[Rector_Ras]

bio could use mega work. I dont know anything really about his past with more then 600 years under his belt he has to have a decent story to tell

 

[Cassanova]

12 battle droids with him at all times? No. Lose them.
Factory? No. Lose it.

As doitean said, please fill in the details of the character using standardised metric measurements. 178cm, or even for height, imperial will work 5'10" - something to that effect.

Added to that, the biography needs a great deal more work. Especially considering you've removed Agecik's portion, but still have him mentioned in the profile.

Overall, this is wholly inadequate. It may meet the requirements as far as number of words are concerned, but it sure as hell doesn't meet any requirements to actually qualify as a character, or even an NPC for that matter.

 

[Darth Tak]

Updated.

 

[Cassanova]

... Wow. You really are scraping the barrel?

A good RP post usually consists of anywhere between 300-1000 words. And that is a matter of moments in the scheme of things. How do you expect to be able to properly depict this character in 67 words that barely form coherent thoughts resembling complex sentences?

Go into detail.

Explain these jobs.
How did he succeed on them?
How did he fail?
What were the repurcussions of those successes and failures?
What the hell does Acegik have to do with this character now?

A character like this should have a biography that comfortably fits well over 500 words, and you are failing yourself and whatever RP's you want to participate in by committing such a barrel-scraping effort.

I fully support HG in denying your character's admission into the Hutt Cartel, and to be frank the fact they're even responding to help you better this character is a step that you don't deserve.

---

EDIT: The post above this line-break was 159 words. I commit that much to simply questioning your character, and you can't scrape 70 words to describe his entire history? I don't see why anyone bothers to help you since you seem so unwilling to even take what they're saying onboard.

 

[Darth Tak]

I'm tired. Tomorrow.

 

[Dóiteán]

Might I suggest you look at the other Hutts to get an idea of what's acceptable

 

[Green Ranger]

I'm tired. Tomorrow.

It's 2pm here. I'm sure you can find the energy sometime today.

Or I can just archive the character. Either way.