Rejected When Night Falls

Mithias

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What is going to happen in your plot?
Zentripoli (Five Syndicates) and Alais (Five Syndicates) are technology criminals in the Corellian District of Nar Shaddaa. Discovering their close proximity to one another, the pair have decided to take their entrepreneurship to the next level. Specifically, they desire to begin gobbling up competition in the Corellian District in the legitimate droid market.

During this plot, Zentripoli, Alais, and their allies are going to take actions to begin securing a monopoly in the legal droid market by putting their nearby competition out of business and establishing a main place of business (large building) for technology needs in the Corellian District, establishing Nightfall Technologies.

What other writers (and their characters) will be a part of this?
Zentripoli – Mithias
Alais – Dread
Jaycce Noradne – Lizziie
*And probably one more

How many threads will this plot have?
5

Include opposition type for each thread (DM, dice, ASK/OPEN, etc):
Self-DM

What do you or your character hope to achieve with this plot? What is the "end-game?” Link any items you’re seeking if applicable.
The goal of this plot is for Alais and Zentripoli (co-owners) to establish the Nightfall Technologies company and secure a large space for the business in the Corellian District of Nar Shaddaa. "Genuis Droid Repair and Mods" (currently owned by Zentripoli) and "Nightfall - Computer repair shop and hangout" (owned by Alais) will fall under Nightfall Technologies once it is established.

This goal will be accomplished/financed by cornering the legitimate droid market in the Corellian District of Nar Shaddaa.
*Lore for "Nightfall Technologies" will be submitted soonish!

Do you need any involvement of canon NPCs, etc.
No.
 
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Darasuum

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Getting a monopoly on a single thing takes a lot of work. I would say three threads of self dming would maybe allow for a single acquisition and that would only extend to the Corellian district of Nar Shaddaa. There's a lot of competition on Nar Shaddaa and cornering the market is no easy task especially with the fact that there are plenty of members that are business types this timeline.

I'd either like to see a more specific goal than creating a handful of monopolies. I'd say pick one thing you are trying to take over. Right now it just seems like a blanket "I'm taking over all money making tech business in the corellian district" which is too broad.
 

Mithias

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Hi Darasuum! Long time, no speak. Thank you for the review.

We have decided to specifically pursue the droid market (sales, repair, illegal, mods, etc.) of the Corellian District in order to obtain the company site. Dread will submit the building soonish. Let me know if the changes are acceptable. Thanks!
@Darasuum
 

Darasuum

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Corning the market on all things droids still a lot. Not to mention people who deal in illegal sales are going to be in a different enough market than the legitimate business people. I still advise you to at least decide between legit and not so legit.

You mention establishing Nightfall Technologies. That is creating a company and out of the gate also gaining a monopoly are two different goals as is. It's not impossible. In fact I think that sounds really cool. But I definitely don't think that should happen with just 3 threads. I would say this plot should probably be at least five or six threads.

The more that you want in terms of a goal (larger building, more npcs, more profitability, etc) keep that in mind when deciding on how many threads and the quality of the RP. The thread limit has risen so I won't say no if you write a well thought out plot that happens to be long. But the more food you order the bigger the bill is going to be if you catch my drift.
 

Mithias

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Thank you for the feedback.

The monopoly, at this point, is really small: legal droid/droid parts market in the Corellian District of Nar Shaddaa. Other plots have influence over planets in as many threads, but we are asking for a place of business as well, so I understand your point of view. I made the monopoly smaller and increased the thread count to 5.

Will these changes suffice?
@Darasuum
 

Darasuum

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Looks good to me. Approved!
 

Mithias

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Hi @Darasuum

We have had a change of heart about this plot and will not be pursuing it. Please archive. Thank you.
 
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