Unanswered Questions

[Kyber Krystal]

It had been a couple of months since Kyber had joined the Jedi Order. Since the young smuggler with barely anything to his name had been invited to join the mystical order of protectors. Overall, his experiences so far had been wonderful, and he had no complaints. He had made a friend that he knew he'd have for a lifetime, and had successfully completed two missions on behalf of the Jedi. All while helping the innocent denizens of the galaxy. But his last mission had begun to seed questions in the young Initiates mind. He had concerns and queries that needed addressing. He wouldn't go as far to say doubts, that seemed a bit of a stretch. He had no doubts in the Jedi's mission, knowing they were only there to do the right thing. But he had... concerns.

During his last mission, Kyber experienced something troublesome he'd never experienced before. He felt anger and rage like nothing he'd ever felt before, towards the slavers of the Black Sun syndicate. And when thoughts of killing the head of the operation crossed his mind... something within him urged him to do it. Something he could only describe as a voice. A whisper. After it spoke, Kyber felt uneasy and almost cold... He ignored it while completing the mission, but it still was troublesome. It continued to bother him during his voyage away from Ord Mantell. Although, Kyebr felt conflicted about it. In that rage, he felt powerful. Like he could do anything. Like his powers with the Force had nearly doubled... He didn't know if it was something to be wary of or not, but to Kyber it needed to be addressed.

He also had more general questions. In his time with the Jedi, he had been preached to that the Sith were bad and that the Mandalorian Dominion was dangerous. Ask anyone born within the Order and they would say the same thing, but Kyber was an outsider. He didn't understand the war they fought. His missions on behalf of the Jedi had all been to help innocent people, yes, but at the end of the day they benefited the Army of Light's war effort. A war effort he did not understand. He had yet to fight a Sith on equal terms, and had only encountered one Mandalorian so far, but he knew not why the Jedi fought. Why the Empire, aside from the oppressive nature on its citizens, was so evil.

Which brought him to today...

JEDI TEMPLE, DANTOOINE​

Kyber didn't really like being on Dantooine. It wasn't his favourite planet. He preferred more urban worlds like Nar Shaadaa, but this was the Jedi's capital. Even when he was on Dantooine, he didn't really enjoy going to many of the classes most Initiates went to. He didn't learn well there. If he wasn't in the Temple Archives, he preferred to be out in the Galaxy, learning and improving his abilities there. However, he came here for one reason, to find the one Jedi Master that he really trusted... Valen. The man who recruited him. The man who so strikingly resembled his father it was almost eery. When he had first been inducted into the Jedi Order, Valen had encouraged him to trust his fellow Jedi. And he did. Kyber found many, like Orlan and Adann, that he was willing to trust. Hell, he would go to Orlan with his problems here if he could. But Valen was the one who would know what to do and what to say. He was the kriffing Grandmaster of the Jedi Order, of course he would... It still baffled Kyber that the Grand Master of the Jedi, the leader of the Jedi, found something worthy enough in him that he would let a stupid smuggler join the Order. Kyber was so grateful to Valen for this... He hoped Valen would be able to spare some time for him again.

Kyber had barely seen the Jedi Grand Master since the time he formally recruited him to the Order. And why would he? Valen was an incredibly busy man. He had done important work, liberating Ithor and solidifying an Alliance with the Hutts. Something Kyber was incredibly happy about because it meant him being a Jedi didn't prevent him from being on worlds in Hutt Space. Kyber had to wonder what it was like being the Grandmaster, and sort of wished he could accompany Valen on more missions. Learn from him and help him in person... but it wasn't his place to ask. Getting these questions answered was more than enough for Valen to do, with his busy schedule.

It didn't take long to land his ship and make his way into the temple. His ship had been technically recognized as a Jedi vessel in the months since he joined, and had gained the credentials to enter any planet in Jedi Space. Something a bit odd for a freighter, but something that Kyber nonetheless appreciated. Kyber, without delay, entered the temple, smiling to the guards on his way in. He moved through quickly and efficiently, smiling to the Masters and his fellow Initiates as he passed. He made his way through, eventually making it to what he knew were Valens chambers. He had never actually been in there before, but there was a first time for everything. Typically, Kyber would have to wonder if he had been there, but he was getting better at extending his senses to the galaxy around him. Sensing the presences and signatures of those around him through the Force.

He opened the door slowly. "Valen?" Kyber asked. "Oh kriff, I mean... Master Valen? May I come in? Is this a bad time?" Kyber was nervous. Valen was the only being in the galaxy capable of making him nervous.

@Valen Pelora

 

[Valen Pelora]

Valen’s brow furrowed. He stared at the map hovering in the air. They were making progress, slow progress. It was not enough. Most of the galaxy was still in chains. Malon, Cain, the whole lot, lording over worlds like fiefdoms. The Force stank of the Darkside. He could win a hundred battles and it would not be enough. As long as the Sith held the core, they held the galaxy. The Emperor and his pets had not joined the fray in years. Valen had a solution to that little problem but it developing slowly. He had a thousand roadblocks with too few solutions.

He shut the map down before turning to the window. He preferred Jedha to Dantooine. His chambers in the Great Temple were high above the desert world. He could look out and see for miles. On Dantooine, all he saw was grass and more grass. The Jedi home-world was beautiful but boring. He was here only because he had to be. It was good for the Jedi to see him at the different temples from time to time. He did not enjoy the task. Valen turned to Alara.

“You’re sure about this?” His administrative assistant nodded. “The reports confirm the movements. Lothal will need bolstering.” What value the Sith placed on planets protected by the Jedi on Lothal he would never know. It did not matter. They deserved their protection. “Tell Sena I need to see her. She’ll head up the defense.” Alara nodded and left the room. He was alone for a moment before he heard the door open. He thought he would find Alara had forgotten something. No. It was a young Jedi he had not seen in some time. Kyber Ortaigen. Valen smiled warmly. “No, no. Not a bad time. Come in, sit.” He took the opportunity to sit in one of the rooms many chairs. “How can I help?” He could sense Kyber’s anxiety in the Force. @Kyber Krystal

 

[Kyber Krystal]

As Kyber was about to open the door fully, he ended up opening the door for a woman who was in Valens chambers before. He recognized her face, he knew her to be Valen's assistant. He recognized her from their encounter on Tatooine, but he had never really exchanged words with her before. As he opened the door for her, he offered a smile in greeting. Kyber noticed her return the smile quickly, before marching off to whatever task she needed to complete. Looked like it wasn't just Valen that was working himself sick. His staff were doing the same.

Kyber entered the room shortly after, shutting the door before taking a second to look around. It was simple in its design, a few chairs, bookshelves and what appeared to be a large map set out across the desk. Kyber assumed the room was mostly used for tactics and planning, leading to an overall function over form mentality. Kyber smiled at Valen, happy to see him again. "You really don't rest, do you?" Kyber asked, half jokingly and half sincere. Kyber wanted to start the meeting off with a bit of a lighthearted remark, betraying the anxiety he felt about meeting Valen like this. But he had to notice his joke carried a little bit of weight. Kyber had become much more adept at sensing the emotions of others in the Force. Though Valens carried himself with confidence and had a great composure, he was stressed. Kyber wasn't able to detect his thoughts, but his stress was undeniable. Presumably about the war effort. Kyber would hope for Valen's sake that he would take a breather. But didn't seem like that would be happening any time soon.

"Good to see you again, Master Valen." The words felt stale in his mouth. Master Valen. Valen never came across like he was superior or better than anyone, so Kyber just never associated that title with him. In addition, a title like that just wasn't something Kyber was used to using. But he respected Valen, and wanted to give him the respect he deserved. "Been a while. Bash any slavers heads together without me?" Kyber wanted to keep it familiar and friendly, despite the little interactions he had so far with Valen.

When he was offered a seat, Kyber took it. He then took a deep breath, and began to tell Valens the reason why he came today:

"Incidentally, part of the reason I came today is related to that... I was recently on Ord Mantell on a mission with Master Barad, where we freed a large group of Savrips from a Black Sun slaving operation. While I was there, I... felt angrier than I ever had before. I lost myself a few times, in some kriffing trance or something." Reliving the experience, speaking about it, made Kyber's levels of anxiety heighten a bit. "I felt angry, but also I felt... good. And near the end, after we had the slaves freed and the Black Sun members in captivity, I... I heard some voice or, something. It told me to kill the slavers, and after it spoke I... I felt cold, and gross, but, I also felt extremely powerful, like I could do anything, and..." Kyber stopped speaking for a second just to gather his thoughts. "I didn't kill anyone, and we brought all the slavers to justice, but... I don't know. I've killed before, but I never felt that way about killing. I've always killed in self defence, this was someone who we had at our mercy, and for all his crimes, I wanted him dead... It just... I don't know what to say or how I should feel... I hoped you could help me out."

@Valen Pelora

 

[Valen Pelora]

Valen listened carefully as Kyber spoke. He nodded slowly as words poured from the young Jedi. He had feared this path when Kyber first joined the Jedi. There was no perfect time to find the Force. The Jedi took students of all ages. An age did not make you good or evil, it did not make you a better or worse Jedi. There were brilliant Jedi who had picked up their first Lightsaber in their twenties. There were life-long Jedi who never truly understood their purpose.

He would never turn a student away from the Order, but older Initiates faced challenges. They had roadblocks on their path. It was difficult to let go of your past, let go of parts of yourself. Valen knew Kyber had lived a hard life. He had feared the Darkness would creep into the young man’s mind. Kyber had largely dashed those fears during his first few months. The young man had proven himself a capable Jedi and quick leaner. Now, he was faced with the Darkness. Valen leaned forward. He searched for his words.

“There is no easy answer.” He paused, trying to think. “I wish I could tell you why you heard the call, what you heard, and how to never hear it again. That would not be the truth. We all hear the whispers of the Darkside at some point in our lives. What makes us Jedi is what we do when we hear the whispers.” Valen was being long winded. He wasn’t even sure he was answering the question. “What changed for you to starting hearing that call? Was it the heat of battle? The lives you took? What was it? That is where to start, then it is possible to determine why the Darkness wormed its way into your mind.” There were Jedi who felt the brush of the Darkness for only a moment their entire lives. Others, struggled till their deaths. There was no easy path. @Kyber Krystal

 

[Kyber Krystal]

So its exactly what he thought. Whispers from the Dark Side. Kyber didn't really expect it to be anything else, but it was... well reassuring wasn't the right word, but it was good to get confirmation at any rate. Really until now, the Dark Side had been mostly academic to Kyber. He had few experiences with the Sith, and the ones he had encountered had been... for lack of a better word, bantha-shit insane. However, he never knew if that was the Dark Side that caused that or the way they were trained. Kyber had his questions about the Dark Side. He felt powerful when it whispered to him, but it also felt cold... somehow wrong. It made him feel sick and out of sorts, but it couldn't deny the sweet tone of the whispers he heard. But it was time for Kyber to answer Valen's question... Open up more than he had ever opened to anyone before.

"Valen, I... I didn't tell you everything about how my father died... I grew up on Kashyyk, among Wookiees in a small isolated village. Our village was raided by slavers when I was younger, and my dad died... he died defending the village. True Jedi, right?" Kyber let out a small chuckle, it was a short laugh that cut through the sadness in Kyber's voice. Almost a gut reaction rather than an actual laugh. "When I saw those slaves on Ord Mantell, and how... how kriffing happy the Black Sun were with themselves for enslaving those Savrips. I just nearly lost it... It was just like when I was younger, powerless to stop anything or stop the slavers, except... now I have power." Kyber clenched his fist, taking another deep breath to regain his composure. "I managed to resist the temptation, but all I wanted to do in that moment was kill that slaver... Though that's exactly what the Darkness wants, isn't it...?"

Kyber stood up, walking over to the window. Whenever he was frustrated or angry, he liked to remember the forests of Kashyyk, and the wonderful bounties that nature provided. The clean, green fields of Dantooine were a nice substitute. Everything here was so peaceful. Kyber could almost sense the light of this place. "Valen, can I ask you something... controversial? Like as a hypothetical question?" Kyber started before going right into his scenario, not waiting for the approval he rhetorically asked for. "If the Dark Side offers power like that... Why do Jedi turn away from that? We want to do the right thing, so why wouldn't using the Dark Side help us do that? Hell, the kriffing Sith use the Dark Side, isn't their creepy-ass Emperor a Sith too? They control the whole Core of the galaxy. Why shouldn't we fight fire with fire?!"

He looked at Valen's face as he finished, realizing that he had started yelling by the end of his question. No doubt the Jedi Grand Master would be disappointed to hear an Initiate promoting usage of the Dark Side. "I'm sorry..." He said shortly before sitting down again. "I'm just frustrated... I know the Dark Side is the easy way out, but... We try, and we try, and we try to do good in the galaxy and it seems that everything we do just gets washed over by more bad. I don't even understand this kriffing war with the Mandalorians and the Empire, or why they're so bad or why we fight them. I ask other Jedi and they're just like, we fight them because it is our duty, or some shit like that, and... I just want to do right by people..." Kyber looked down again, taking a deep breath. He was silent for a second, taking the chance to gather his thoughts... Before looking up once more, asking Valen one more question.

"How do you do it? You're the Grand Master of the Jedi, you deal with all the stress in the galaxy. You've seen the worst in the Galaxy. I can sense the stress your under... How do you do it? How do you stay so strong? How do you resist the Dark Side's pull... What the hell am I talking about? You probably don't feel it at all..."

@Valen Pelora

 

[Valen Pelora]

Valen listened to everything Kyber had to say. It was quite a lot from the young Jedi. He expected questions as the Initiate learned the ways of the Force. There was only so much you could learn in a classroom. Questions would always pop up and need to be answered. It rested on Valen and the other experienced Jedi to answer those question. They needed to teach the younger generation, now more than ever. The war presented moral questions even the greatest Jedi struggled to answer. It was even more dangerous for the young. A simple truth ate at his core. He was not the bastion of calm he appeared to be. The Darkness called to him as it never had before. He was willing to do whatever it took to win the war, to save the galaxy, to defeat the Sith. Valen walked the line and teetered near the edge. He was the only one who knew it.

“The Darkness is not the answer.” He stood. He clasped his hands behind his back and walked towards the window as he spoke. “It is tempting. It is powerful. Great and terrible things can be done with the Darkside of the Force.” Valen paused for but a moment. “It will devour your soul, turn you as black as the night sky. There is much we don’t know about the Force but one thing we know for sure. The Darkside corrupts. There can be no good men who wield the Darkness. It will bend them, twist them, and use them. We would find the galaxy rid of the Sith only to have replaced them.”

He battled with how honest to be with Kyber. He tried to be honest with everyone who came to him, but some things were best left unsaid. “I am not extraordinary. There has never been anything special about me. I feel the pressures of the galaxy and I meditate. I feel the call of the Darkness and I ask my friends for help. That is all we can do. Ask questions, ask for aid, find yourself. There is no great secret.”

Valen knew when the war was over, his time with the Jedi would follow. @Kyber Krystal
OOC: End Thread