Tum Ell

TIMMEL

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NAME: Ell'Tum
Tum
FACTION: The Kjlljk Protectorate
RANK: N/A
SPECIES: Taz'goreii
AGE: 36
GENDER: male
FORCE SENSITIVE: Unknown

APPEARANCE:
Standing at 2.09 m tall Tum is an imposing monster to behold, his heavy weight of 180 Kg comprised mostly of muscle mass only adds to his terrifying visage.

Tum's deep ebony colored skin coupled with his bright chrimson and dark black eyes are a rare combination of physical attributes for a member of his species. Tum also possesses a pair of 12 cm tusks and keeps his long black hair in tight dreadlocks.

ATTRIBUTES:
Like most of his species, Tum possesses incredible strength, a hardy constitution, and a rediculous stamina when compared to other species.

Unlike most of his species, Tum is incredibly intelligent for a Taz'goreii, his intellect is equivalent to a slightly above average member of other more typically intelligent species. This has allowed Tum to counteract the typically rage full and short tempered traits common in his species which allows him to operate more successfully in civilized society's.

He is not without his weaknesses however, his large size hinders his speed, making him unable to catch most fleeing prey. He also holds little value in currency, causing him to often be under paid in some situations.

PERSONALITY:
Tum's personality is described as extremely territorial of his things especially his ship. Embedded from birth, Tum has an unnatural commitment to whatever goals he sets for himself, and often faces all problems head on. His often lack of planning can lead to technical failure which will often make him extremely frustrated.

Tum's religious belief plays a heavy part on his personality, the Taz'goroth guiding him to persist against any adversity that might be against him.

BIOGRAPHY:
Born on the harsh planet of Rattatak, Tum grew up in the rough tribal warfare natural to his planet. He excelled in the martial combat needed to succeed and survive in the savage setting he'd been born into. Tum however yearned for more, often spending his nights looking to the stars, and developing a need to know what was out there. Tum continued his life, with a deep wonder of the outside galaxy but had little way to depart his own planet.

One day at the age of 19 Tum came across a small band of scientists who had landed on Rattatak in a Tensor-Class Shuttle for a reason unknown to him. He and seven of his tribesmen ambushed the security force escorting the scientists eliminating them all and leaving only Tum and two other tribesmen. The others then took the scientists as prisoners and began to make their way back to his tribe. Tum who was supposed to take the pilot and another scientist back to their encampment decided to take this one chance to abandon his planet. Taking the two hostage he demanded they take him off this planet in exchange for their lives.

Days later Tum was dropped on a planet he didn't know, it was a massive urban planet. Confused and thrust into a new environment Tum struggled for two years before finally landing steady work as a smugglers muscle. His size and ability in combat landing him the job easily. For 11 years Tum worked eventually earning a top wage for a body guard. During this decade Tum's captain taught him to to be highly proficient in short and mid range blaster combat, and to be an above average pilot.

When the captain was killed in a drunken cantina skirmish between his smuggling band and a gang of pirates who decided to pay with their lives instead of their credits. Tum then took over as captain after some infighting in the crew, leaving him with just enough to operate the ship.

Taking his newly acquired Axion assault ship Tum took to the stars as a free lance smuggler for a few years, his self employment led to vast successes and some occasional failures as he figured the business out. In the years during the war Tum played no part in it, sticking to his own world of smuggling, if not for the sudden lapse in customs, he may never had known the Republic had fallen.

SKILLS:
1. Tum is a high class pilot, more than capable of holding his own.
2. With over a decade of applied training and practice, Tum has become a near expert of short to mid range blaster combat.
3. Life on Rattatak has provided him with much more than a general knowledge of martial and melee combat.

Non-Skills
Tum has no skill with computer software, and has no ability to repair or otherwise service any sort of mechanical device.

GEAR:
2X KPWD-Wardens Blaster.

20X magazines.
Vagabond Armor.
Tum's Vibro-Axe.

Roleplays:
Order#31894
 
Last edited:

TIMMEL

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Not finished yet, but would love some critique.
 

GABA

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Please be sure you're creating an original character here. While borrowing elements here and there from other franchises to help your character develop is ok, due be sure you're not trying to convert that character into someone RP-able for this website.

Thanks!
 

Valen Pelora

Mike, Joe Swanson
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Hey man!

Just one small thing I noticed. Endor is not a large metropolis planet. The moon that orbits Endor (where Return of the Jedi takes place) is a relatively undeveloped forest moon. The planet it circles (Endor) is a big ol gas giant with no inhabitants.
 

Apollyon

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The Taz'goreii use a naming structure that goes a little something like this! threetofourletterlastname'personalname
The last name is usually an identifier for which tribe they were born and raised in. This is ESPECIALLY true if they were born on Rattatak.

Outside of that, cool character! I'm happy to see my species getting some use :)
 

TIMMEL

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Gaba-wan kenobi im not sure what you mean? I just wrote all of this last night, and I don't have any characters like this anywhere.

Valen thank you I'll have to recheck and decide where to put him at.

Apollyon thank you for making them, I was almost gonna make a stupid wookie until I found your "orcs" here I was very happy!

More work to come.
 

TIMMEL

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So just to make sure I understand this, I can't have armor and use the force? Why not?
 

TIMMEL

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Also do I not need to be approved to start playing?
 

Mad Dog

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So just to make sure I understand this, I can't have armor and use the force? Why not?

That is correct, that rule was made for balance between players that don't use the force and those that do. It's to level the PVP playing field.

Also:
Also do I not need to be approved to start playing?

Sort of. You can't be in any main or faction like threads until you get approval, although seeing as how you don't have any force in your background that means we don't need to contact the Jedi or Sith FL's. But we'll need to fix him up a bit before you're technically allowed to begin. I'll do a full review now.
 

Mad Dog

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Haha I like the concept, a super smart ogre which means just about average haha.

So I found a few things.
Not a big deal, but your "Rank" will be agent.

I would say maybe expand his personality a bit, though lots of people don't even include that portion, but I would suggest you still keep it around and try to make it a bit bigger.

I like your background/Bio it's pretty decently well written. So that part is probably fine.

This characters skills is a very short section. You'll be playing this character in live RP's it might do some good to expand those, perhaps add a few? I underestand the concept of a just barely smart enough warrior guy, but having a few not combat related skills isn't a bad thing, your choice though.

That's a pretty rockin blaster, it's probably the best on the site ;) and it was made by one of the site's coolest members. Haha.

Your gear section is kinda light, here a couple of links for tech for you to look at.

This is the generic technology.

And the other technology.

Don't let the term generic fool you there's some good stuff there.
 

Dark child

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It's always good to see a character based off one our member created races.

I think Gabba was just saying not to make him too 40k-ish. He seems different enough to me.

You can have armor but no functions.

This is true. The Vagabond Armor is fine just don't add a flame thrower, grappling hooks, etc if you plan on making him force sensitive.

This is just my opinion, but unless you plan on having him use the force extensively I would just list his force sensitivity as "none" and then make use of a ton of gadgets since he seems like more of a tank character who relies on his weapons more than anything.

Change his Rank to Agent.

The Axion class ship is his right? Tell use how many crew members he has and possibly how they view him as their captain.

Relent may have a thing or two to add but in the meantime, feel free to get involved in some threads.
 

Mad Dog

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It's always good to see a character based off one our member created races.

I think Gabba was just saying not to make him too 40k-ish. He seems different enough to me.



This is true. The Vagabond Armor is fine just don't add a flame thrower, grappling hooks, etc if you plan on making him force sensitive.

This is just my opinion, but unless you plan on having him use the force extensively I would just list his force sensitivity as "none" and then make use of a ton of gadgets since he seems like more of a tank character who relies on his weapons more than anything.

Change his Rank to Agent.

The Axion class ship is his right? Tell use how many crew members he has and possibly how they view him as their captain.

Relent may have a thing or two to add but in the meantime, feel free to get involved in some threads.

@Dark child Is pretty awesome, he's got your back if you have any queations.
 

Mad Dog

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@TIMMEL once you get these small things taken care of we can get you up and running.
 
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