Ask The Forest for the Trees

[Talak Rand]

Talak had set out from the Nar Shaddaa and made his way to Endor almost immediately. Rather than set down on the planet's surface, he had attached the Nomad to the side of old debris from the second Death Star, and simply floated there for days. It wasn't the first time he had pulled a trick like this with asteroids, and he preferred it to being more exposed on the surface of a planet.

But now the time to meet his newest apprentice had arrived, and Talak set his ship down at the coordinates that had been relayed between the two. It would mark the beginning of her training, and he wondered if she had any real idea of what she was getting into. With Ana and even Ender, the path had been an unpleasant one filled with a great deal of pain. With Lilith taking her first steps into the Force at all, he wondered if he would go easy on her. He hadn't with Ender, but more than that, he began to wonder if he had it within himself to do what he had in the past.

The questions would soon be answered, and the Legionnaire waited. This time, unlike on Nar Shaddaa, Talak was dressed in his more traditional black robes. His own personal lightsaber was clipped to his belt, and for the first time he didn't have anything covering his face. It was one of the reasons he'd picked this world: it was isolated enough that the two could train in peace without any sort of interruption or fear of being found out.

He dropped to his knees in meditation as he waited, reaching out to the cycle of this world. Like Kashyyyk, but perhaps slightly less profound, the cycles of life and death were so obvious. The creatures of this world were so vibrant in the Force, and it would provide a good starting point for his new student to experience the Force. Devoid of the taint that sentient life so often provided to it. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

To say that Lilith took some time to get use to traveling in space again was an understatement. In good sense, she'd bought a droid to help with navigation. She might not have made it without it. And luckily, she got a hold of a decently priced ship and named it the Rain. The name had meaning, but only to her.

This time instead of a gray cloak she wore a black one over her armor, and no helmet. If the planet was as she read, there'd be no need to hide beneath one. Regaurdless, her light hair was braided much the same as when she last saw Talak. She put her first and only lightsaber on her belt before walking out of her ship. She'd landed it down close to Talak's, or hopefully his. His ship looked well used, which told her something about the man.

But the first thing that struck her were the trees. She'd seen them while landing, but now walked beneath the looming giants. There were so, so many. It was as if the sea of signs on Nar Shaddaa had been replaced with something...somethings living. This was the first time she'd seen real trees and the introduction was breathtaking.

Her eye's were widened in awe, and she was so enamored that she walked right past Talak without noticing him. One of her hands came up and rested on a trunk. Her hand was gloved, but she could still feel that that it was rough.

It took a few quickened heartbeats before she remembered why she was here, and turned to see a kneeling man. Her eyes fluttered for a second as she tried to focus on him and not the environment. "Master?" she asked, tipping her head. It was the first time she'd seen his face, but the second words that came from her were simply, "I-I didn't know trees were this size...and there are so many..."

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak didn't move as the ship set down or as Lilith walked around the open ground. He could sense her mind and it felt similar to his first time setting foot on Coruscant. Being raised on an underpopulated world in the Unknown Region, it had been shocking to visit a world so densely populated. She was the opposite. She had only lived on worlds smothered in "society" and its belching smog. This world's air was clear and the trickling stream nearby was relaxing... at least to Talak.

Welcome to the forest moon of Endor, he said. Location of the final battle between the Galactic Empire and the Rebel Alliance, he said. It had taken him time to catch up on the history of the galaxy, but the more recent events had been more pressing. The study of a Sith Lord turned Emperor was the most relevant.

It's beautiful, isn't it? he asked. He genuinely enjoyed this world. He had actually managed to see a variety of exciting worlds during his travels, and this one had been one of his first stops after leaving his homeworld. It was always one of his favorites to come back to when he needed time alone.

And they're alive, he pointed out, waiting for her to reach out and feel the difference between this world and Nar Shaddaa. Following and honing of the senses was arguably the most valuable tool that a Force-user had in their arsenal. Listening to the Force when it spoke would save your life. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

A battle between an Empire and Rebels. It was not the first time she'd heard of such a thing, even as a street rat those tales were not uncommon to hear whispered around a fire, or blurted out by a drunk. It meant there had been death here, and lots of it. The scenery just hid it, or, at least, from where she currently stood. Despite that, she answered his question with, "It's.... breathtaking" in a soft and swept away voice.

Closing her eyes, her senses were instantly bombarded with life. It seemed as if everything was alive on this world. The trees, the green beneath her feet, the bushes and fruit they bared, the...creatures. It was hard to focus on just one thing. And even though it did not have the structures Nar Shaddaa had to shelter life, it almost felt more alive.

But there was also something else, confirmed by short bursts of high pitched howls, or screeches in the distance. It sapped away some of the magic of this world almost instantly for Lilith. "But there's more to this place than it's beauty," she started, her senses still extended but finally honing in on something—what disturbed her. "There's no place that doesn't have danger, is there?"

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak watched as she drunk it in. She needed to experience it all: the good and the bad. She needed to feel the darkness for herself. It was cold and harsh, but it promised whatever she would want. Talak had yet to determine if it actually delivered on that promise. Feelings of helplessness still plagued him in the quiet moments... and sometimes in the violent moments, too. He needed answers, but those answers were elusive.

No, there isn't, he said. In order to have life you have to have death. This is nature, he said, letting the idea sink into her mind. She would be able to sense the truth for herself. It wasn't a matter of his opinion, it was the circle of life.

He rose from his knees for the first time and walked over next to her.

Reach beyond the life. Find the hole at the center of this place. Where a million lives were snuffed out in an instant. Do you feel the darkness? he asked. It would be her first real test. Would she pull back from it or embrace it? He could only guess what it would promise her, but he knew there would be something. Whatever she wanted in the seat of her soul. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

Lilith understood, at least she believed so. Without death the galaxy could not function, it'd run out of resources and room. It was a simple concept. Culling out numbers made room for for new minds with new ideas that could change the galaxy.

She could feel him get closer and then thought on his words for a few heartbeats. The darkness? she thought, digging deeper into the world. Extending her sense further, past the danger until she felt... something else. It almost felt as if it sensed her too, and it whispered to her.

It started as a single, distant voice that drew her closer out of curiosity. Then another voice emerged... and another and another voice until what seemed like a million voices. They were all so loud, so overwhelming but still so distant. It left her confused and frozen from the fear of not knowing what to do. Memories of the betrayal she suffered, the physical abuse she suffered from living on the street. It touched the very surface of her deep seeded, almost crippling fear of beytral and abandonment, and right then she pushed back as much as she could, screaming a, "NO!"

Lilith breathed in sharply, cradling her head in her hands in an effort to comfort herself. But at the very edge of it all she could sense... power. The power she needed to protect herself, but the whispers continued to intensify and so she tried to pull back with another sharp breath. "Talak... help?" she pleaded.

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak could feel her agony in the Force. It was the same agony that he felt so often from those enslaved and seeking escape. It was the pain that she needed to embrace if she wanted to understand her full potential, and it was the feelings he hated his students tapping into. He hated forcing them down this path, and he despised what it did to him. He wondered if there was a way out, but he gritted his teeth and pressed on.

Don't pull back. Embrace it, he said in a harsh tone. If she could push past the initial pains she would quickly sink into a power that was intoxicating.

This is your place, he said. He was a hypocrite. He forced others to embrace the darkness and shied away from it himself. He was afraid of the very thing that he pushed others to go into. What kind of a wretch was he balancing between the good and the evil. Pathetic. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

He answered her pleas, but not by helping her. Even though she'd cried out to him, clearly afraid, clearly tormented and wanting out, he'd spoke to her harshly in return and left her all alone.

The voices whispered to her clearer now, telling her this was what she feared the most, abandonment. He'd lead her here then abandoned her here to them in her moment in weakness. But they offered her power to help herself, and get what she desired the most in the moment.

It took her no time to accept it, embrace what the darkness offered. Her fingers curled in the anger, the pain but most importanly in the thought of retribution. Her hand jerked out towards Talak suddenly, whom was right beside her, and between her fingers a burst of tainted lightning shot out towards him.

She did not care about his warning earlier on Nar Shadda. She did not care about how he'd react. No, all she cared about was hurting him for hurting her. "YOU BASTARD!" she shouted as she turned to him, her eyes flickering yellow. She added a second hand of lightning to the assault, screaming even louder, "YOU WERE WILLING TO LET ME STAY THERE AND SUFFER! YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD!"

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak watched with both his eyes and his feelings as she engaged with the darkness for the first time. It was corrupting and terrifying, and he wanted to offer her help, but he couldn't. If she didn't feel this for herself she would never have a concept of it. She would never know the depths of the power that it offered. He told himself that he wasn't killing anyone to get to her or tormenting her in the same that he'd been tormented. He told himself he hadn't become his master, but he wasn't sure he believed it.

The darkness in her fed a primal part of him, and only now as he had control over another person did he feel like he may have finally grasped what the dark side had always promised him.

She lashed out at him, and the darkness inside of him didn't appreciate it. He wasn't moving as himself anymore, he was moving like a puppet on a string under the power of the darkness. Resisting it was growing harder each time.

His lightsaber came up in his hands and caught the lighting fired at him. A quick learner, indeed. But you need to teach her her place, a voice in his mind seemed to echo. He let his own Force energy flow through the blade and the lightning would no longer be fired at him, but redirected back at her. Caught in her own agony as the lightning would likely begin to wrack her body. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

She had no time or ability to react to his counter. They were so close to one another, he had the time to react and bring a saber to his free hand while she was busy using both of hers in the initial assault. Thus no matter how much she would've done if possible to avoid feeling the searing pain of lightning again, the counter hit it's mark.

Lightning wracked her body, prompting her to scream so loudly she could already feel her voice leaving her. The force of it pushed her back into the tree trunk nearby, which also hurt and took her breath away in one foul swoop. She fell to her knees and hands right as it ended, as the last sparks jumped off her.

First mental anguish, then physical. It was so much at once, in such a short period of time. But this was also when her senses kicked back in, and she regretted lashing out at him for a second time. Looking back up she attempted to push herself to her knee. "I-I'm sorry," she said, watching him closely. She wasn't actually sorry, but unsure of how he'd react now. "I wont do it again," she added, trying to both recover and prepare if she had to fight for her life, per his warning about patience.

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak wasn't quite feeling himself. The corruption was taking hold ever deeper into his mind each time he came out to play these "games." Its talons had sunk in deeply now, and he couldn't find even a hint of pity in himself as he watched her struggle in agony. A small piece of him screamed out inside, but it was silenced.

She seemed to catch herself now, but he was seeing red. She would feel the Force begin to close in around her throat and lift her from the ground. Without warning, he would slam her down into the ground, but that would be it. He looked down and his hand was trembling as he snapped out of it. His legs felt weak and he took a step back. What was he doing?

He almost lost his balance as he turned and started to walk away. He felt ill, and suddenly the fresh air of this world wasn't so clear. He felt stifled like the world was closing in around him, and there was no escape. He was losing control in a whole new way. The dark side promised he wouldn't be at anyone else's mercy again, but now he wasn't even himself. Wasn't that worse?

He steadied himself against a tree and tried to breathe, but nothing seemed to come. Every muscle felt like it was being squeezed and his head felt tight like a rubber band was clenched around it too many times. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

Her words didn't seem to even phase him. Within him she could sense the very darkness that scared her, and then the Force wrapped around her neck. Both her hands came up to try to wrestle with the invisible force but she didn't have the understanding, training or the strength at the moment to fight against it. The choking didn't last long, a blessing and curse, as it ended when she found herself slammed back into the ground.

When she could breath again she did so in gasps and coughs. It was then that she felt truly broken, and against her will warm tears started to stream down her cheeks. The only thing she could muster was the minuscule amount of will left in her not to sob, to not make her crying obvious to him.

He walked away, and for once she could sense conflict, pain, confusion within him. What was she suppose to do now? If she crawled to her ship to run, there was no guarantee he wouldn't get even angrier and actually kill her. And where would she go now? She couldn't return to Nar Shaddaa alone with what she'd experienced— armed with knowledge but not enough to really understand it. It'd likely drive her off the edge. She wouldn't be able to live with it.

Shaking, she pushed up off the ground, falling back down in her first few attempts before pushing through it and being able to get up. She was slouched. After all, she'd been electrocuted, slammed into a tree and the ground and choked in a short period of time. But she was able to limp her way behind Talak before falling to her hands and knees again. Despite what he had done, despite hating him with every fiber of her being right now, she choose him.

"Master..." Lilith said, coughing after and trying to wipe away her tears so he wouldn't see them. She didn't know what to say or do beyond that.

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak felt as if something inside of him had broken. If this was what it meant to be a legionnaire then he wasn't sure he wanted it. He didn't want to wipe out entire civilizations or torture his students. He didn't want to indulge in this growing evil inside of him. But he didn't know how to get out. He didn't know how to escape this life that was all he had ever known.

He turned and saw Lilith moving toward him. She was weak and had taken a beating. It was a miracle that she was standing at all after what she'd just been through, and, indeed, she collapsed a moment later. What could he say to her? What could he say that would justify any of this?

I'm sorry... he said. Now there was something that he wasn't supposed to say. Apologies certainly weren't the way of the dark side, but kriff the dark side.

I can't teach you about the darkness, he said. He could teach her about the Force. The philosophy of it and even how to access it... how it connected them all, but he couldn't help her embrace it like he should have. That may have made him a failure as a master, but he couldn't have cared less right then.

He pushed himself away from the tree, and bent down in front of her. He didn't think she'd try to kill him, but even if she did, he wasn't sure he would have stopped her.

He reached into his belt and jammed a healing stim into her neck - yeah, he probably should have warned her - and she would begin to fell... at least slightly better. He would wait until she had recovered before they continued, and this time it would come with a different approach. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

She didn't understand when he said sorry. It didn't make sense after he had physically and physiologically hurt her, beyond anything she'd experienced before. No, he hadn't just hurt her he'd broken part of her. His follow up words made her believe that maybe he was saying he wouldn't teach her anymore because of what she'd done. Maybe? It was confusing to her, and hard to think while in so much pain.

When he bent down in front of her she flinched, not sensing danger but that didn't mean the fear of him was not there after what had happen moments ago. She did not expect a stim, which made her nearly jump at first. It, of course, did not take long for her to start feeling a bit better. The pain was still there, but less so. With the ability to move more, she pushed herself back onto her knees. It was partly so she wasn't in such a weak looking position, but mostly to gain some distance between the two.

"Is it... is it because of what I did?" she finally spoke, referring to lashing out at him. She looked away in an effort not to make eye contact with him before continuing, "I'm sorry, master. I'm sorry. It was a mistake, and I don't know what I'll do without your guidance. I can feel the darkness in me now." She brought a hand over her forehead to cradle it. "Whispering to me."

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

What had he done? Another person broken and another soul torn apart. And for what? A goal that he wasn't even sure the rest of the Sith Eternal believed in? So they could massacre people without remorse of hesitation? Maybe actions like that needed hesitation!

No, it's not because of what you did, he said as she started to move away from him. He sat back against the tree behind him, leaning against it as if he was exhausted.

I'll teach you about the Force... he said, trying to figure out how to explain this. But that darkness is something you have to learn how to live with. But if you embrace it, it will consume you, he said. What she had seen from him was precisely a glimpse into how it could be. It brought about a side that was vicious and wicked.

And you risk becoming a monster... he said. It was the inevitable end, and he wasn't sure it was a cost he was willing to pay any longer. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

A small amount of relief washed over her when he said it wasn't because of what she'd done. Though her mind went straight to his next words. She thought on them, wiping away the last bit of tears hidden at the side of her eyes when she thought he wasn't looking.

"Do you feel pain, remorse or weak as a monster...?" she asked, unsure if it was the right path to inquire about. Thinking about it, right now she felt at least two of those things. Pain and weakness. Both of which the darkness offered to help with. She didn't want to be weak, she'd promised herself she wouldn't be and now here she was...

Lilith glanced back at him and decided to put a little bit more distance between them, and utilize a tree like he was to combat the tireness of her body. She pushed herself back, leaning against a tree but hugging her knees against her chest and resting her head on them. She was facing away from him now, watching the environment instead. It still held that beauty, but it was notably tainted in her mind now.

"It wouldn't... be easier as a monster?" she asked, not questioning his warning per say, but wondering about it. "If it is our place in the Force to cull life...in massive amounts. Should we not be as strong as possible? Not weak like..." like she felt right now, she thought, but there was no way Lilith would verbalize that.

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

She was picking up on the paradox that was the dark side - or perhaps the Force in general - rather quickly. It offered something, but it wasn't true. It was like a mirage.

Yes and no, he said. Nothing could be simple. No answer was as simple as a single word. If you want to keep any part of your humanity you'll feel pain and remorse, he said. She turned to face the far side of the planet, looking out at the blue skies and green trees. Even this beautiful world held its own type of torment.

You would think it would be easier, but are you willing to give up everything that it means to be human? he said. It was the core of the problem. And is it really the way to wipe out everyone indiscriminately? he asked. It was borderline blasphemous to the Sith Eternal, and he didn't really expect her to have the answers. He knew he shouldn't have been this conflicted, and certainly not in front of someone else.

Weakness... he said with a snort of disdain. It'll promise that you'll be strong. It'll promise you what you want, but it'll always come up just short, he said. He had fought for years to become powerful enough to keep those he cared about safe, and then it was that darkness that had driven away one of the only people he felt he could be open with.

The dark side has a lot of promises, but delivery isn't so certain... he said. He seemed to have as many questions as answers, and this was why nothing could be simple. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

At first she wondered if she'd care about losing her humanity. What did she need it for? She didn't have anyone she cared for... or did she? The Sith Eternal was her new life—there were more men and women out there—and despite how cruel Talak had been she was still by his side. Still hanging off his every word. Something tugged at the side of her mind, telling her she was lying to herself if she thought losing it all was fine. There was so much conflict.

Then Talak said something else that seemed to clash with what he'd said before. Was it a test or his genuine feelings? "If not indiscriminately, then it'd need to be systematically and then one world... how could we fix even one world within our life times that way?" She breathed in deeply, feeling that typical frustration of hers again before continuing, "There's no Galactic Empire's that could force order on worlds." She referred to the bit of history he mentioned, and the stories she'd heard on the street. "So what other option is left?"

He mentioned, or perhaps admitted, that the Dark Side did not always deliver. Still that conflict and temptation was there in her mind. The need to use it, but perhaps to be extra careful. "I understand your warning but...I don't know if I can resist it," she admitted, her hands gripping her legs tightly. It was the first time she really felt like she was going against his teachings. "Even if it doesn't deliver exactly what I want, even if I only draw from it when I need it, I saw your strength in it. It's stronger than I am. And I don't want to be..I can't be..."

Weak, a voice whispered in her mind.

@Phoenix

 

[Talak Rand]

And there was another of those questions. If they didn't purge entire societies, how could they do it? Could they build an Empire? That wasn't something that seemed feasible in their lifetime. It would take years at the least if not longer.

But could he justify wiping out innocent people? He'd once nearly talked a Jedi into committing genocide if it would lead to prosperity for the rest. The individuals killed would become one with the Force, but how much pain and agony was still going to be left behind? Loved ones lost and never seen again. Maybe the Jedi weren't all wrong. Or perhaps they really were weak like he'd always said and he was simply too weak.

He sighed as she said that she couldn't resist it. That was the truth of it all, wasn't it? It was easier to give in and far more alluring in its own way.

I'm stronger because where you've been doing this for a few weeks I've been doing it my whole life, he said, but he also knew it wasn't entirely true.

But the dark side is a path to power. So what's power worth to you? Because it's easy to give in, he said with a shake of his head. He knew how easy it was first hand. The question wasn't rhetorical, and he waited. What she wanted out of life may well dictate where her life went. He couldn't stop her, but he could let her make a true decision for herself. Of course, he was to be cursed because he was the on that had let her taste that darkness that was so addicting. @Dread

 

[Lilith Vye]

He hadn't answered her first question, but was there even an answer? How could they possibly save the galaxy without purging it's rotten worlds?

She didn't entirely believe he was stronger simply for that fact, and the whispers in her mind told her he was lying. Lilith brought her hands to her head again to cradle it, as if she was trying to protect her mind despite knowing it was futile. Would these whispers ever stop? Was it this planet and it's dark core formed from death? She shook her head and sighed again.

"I don't know, Talak. It's... it's too much to process now," she admitted. Maybe she wasn't as conflicted as him, but she was conflicted. All these doubts, questions, desires, whispers were swimming around in her head.

"But... I think I need to explore the darkness, use it and decide if I need to stay there," she said, which was basically saying her choice was the Dark Side, but she just didn't quite understand that. What she did understand was that she may never be able to turn back, even if she decided the darkness was too much. It was a risk, but her whole life had been one big risk after another, hadn't it?

Shaking her head again, Lilith tried to move onto another subject. She couldn't keep dwelling on this dilemma right now, not without completely breaking down. She felt something tug at her from her belt, and remembered her lightsaber. Lilith reached for it, staring at it for a handful of heartbeats before adding, "Master... you said that you would help me with this blade." It was in that moment that she realized it felt heavier now, more resistant to her, which made her frown and prompted her to ask, "Or is there a way to make my own?" not certain she even wanted to use this one.

@Phoenix