That Awkward Moment

[Varyn Rask]

Varyn Rask was not one for going out and doing anything social, but he was out on Nar Shaddaa, and Tasha had mentioned she worked somewhere on world, so he decided to reach out. She said she worked at a bar or something on world... the Toasted Twi'lek? Or the Titillating Togrutan? Or... something like that? He wondered what she did there. Probably a bartender or something... seemed odd given she was a Sith, but who knew? He certainly didn't.

He'd been out here because of all the conflict going on, and he was tired. He needed to see someone who wasn't Dav, and she was one of his only friends. That was kind of a sad commentary since he wasn't even sure that she even liked him, but she didn't seem to dislike him.

Imagine his excitement when he'd called her up and awkwardly asked her if she wanted to meet up for drinks and she'd actually said yes! They picked a bar, and he was on his way.

The smell of death sticks and alcohol was strong in the air, but other than that it wasn't so bad. He didn't get the impression that there would be any roaches climbing out from under the bar, and the glasses looked clean. He picked a table in the corner of the room and slid into the booth with his back to the wall. He watched the people making their way around, looking for the beautiful blue-skinned woman he was here to meet, but saw only the usual crowd. For his part, Varyn had his hood up. She would likely mock him for it, but the thought had barely even crossed his mind. There were far stranger things in this bar than a man in a hood.

At least he'd managed not to bring the mask or the sword! In fact, thinking about the mask made him realize he had yet to tell Tasha his real name. If he was defecting, it was probably about time... yeah... probably....

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

Tasha had half considered simply telling him to come by the Lusty Lekku just for kicks. Of course, she was performing tonight, and she knew she’d laugh if she saw him watch her work. She decided, however, that she would save that hilarity for another night. In truth, she herself needed a break from work. Tonight her shift ended earlier, and she agreed to meet with him at a different bar. What was the made up name he gave her again? Coryx? Cervix? Who knows… oh yeah! Corax.

She left the LL after changing, though that still meant a tight fitting dress that revealed ample cleavage. Tasha was never one for dialing back on the flaunting, and why not? She had a lot of assets to show off. Her rich, red hair was on her shoulders and she still had some faint glitter on her from the performance earlier. Tasha put away the stash of credits she earned tonight, putting on more perfume to mask the sweat from dancing for several hours.

Tasha entered the bar, her movements as graceful as ever. She ignored the glances she caught her way, always turning heads wherever she went. Whether it was disgust for her being an alien or appreciation for her beauty, she was always used to eyes on her. Tasha could sense him in the Force, and she made her way over, unsurprised to find him in some corner with his hood up.

“Can you be any more cliche?” Tasha said with a grin. She sat down across from him, eyeing him with her yellow gaze, “I feel like I should be passing you some credits and giving you the name of some poor son of a bitch to stab like in a Holomovie,” She laughed at the thought, obviously in a good mood.

 

[Varyn Rask]

He sensed her before he saw her, but once he saw her... wow. Somehow she always managed to look very attractive, and although it shouldn't have been surprising given what she looked like, he was still surprised. He looked up and saw her gliding toward him, confident as she ever was as she slid into her seat, smiling broadly before telling him he looked cliche.

The comment was met with a dumbfounded expression.

He honestly had no idea what she was talking about for a moment until she continued and mentioned stabbing someone. Oh, the HOOD, he thought as it suddenly clicked. Or was it the black and edgy robes? Or the semi-armored gloves? Oh for kriff's sake... At least he had left behind the sword and mask! He continued to cling to that fact as if it would in some way excuse the rest of his very assassin-like attire.

Uh... he mumbled awkwardly before looking down at his clothes. He really didn't have much to say. ...yeah, I don't have a very diverse wardrobe, he finally mustered. It would immediately leave the impression in her mind that he had a week's worth of the exact same outfit hanging in his closet.... and she would be pretty much right.

He reached up and begrudgingly pulled the hood back for the first time since she'd seen him, leaving him not completely shrouded in edgy "mystery." You look... oh boy, what was a nice generic word that wouldn't get him in any kind of an awkward situation? Hurry Varyn, think of something! Pretty? Gorgeous? Sexy? What! NO! Thin! .... thin, Varyn.... What kind of a compliment was that?! Hurry and pick something before this becomes awkward Wait, this was already awkward! ...nice! he said with a bit too much excitement in his tone.

Oh for kriff's sake, Varyn, he cursed himself for this. Was he really this pathetic around women? He made a note to ask Dav when he got back to the ship before realizing that even Dav had probably never seen him like this before... it was uncharted territory for him, and he was off to a magnificent start. He could stare down a Jedi without a second thought, but put him in front of a woman and evidently things were not so fearsome.

He had never been so thankful to have his pathetic attempts at conversation cut off than when the server droid came rolling up to take their orders. Varyn himself a bourbon on the rocks and waited for Tasha to order before the droid rolled off again.

I... uh... realized I never actually gave you my real name, he said, recalling how she had commented back when they first met about how she didn't care. I'm Varyn, he said, deciding they were probably past that point.

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

Tasha could only stare at him curiously as he practically melted into a puddle right before her eyes. Was this truly the same man that made that very dramatic Holonet address? She kept her thoughts to herself, watching him with the faintest smile on her face. He would be used to it by now, and it always appeared as if she found everything amusing. Tasha found his completely flustered side almost endearing, as it was a stark contrast to how he was on the battlefield.

She had to chuckle at his compliment, that same tickling laugh that was light as a feather, “Nice? I have a feeling a few other words crossed your thoughts just there,” She grinned at him, her yellow eyes glowing through the low lighting. It was always impossible to truly tell what she was thinking, her eyes having no pupils to provide the added details. Tasha looked over to the droid, ordering herself an expensive glass of exported wine. As the droid swiveled away, she glanced after it, “I hope you plan on buying me a drink,” She said quietly before turning to look at him again.

When he gave her his name, she smiled, “I was wondering when I’d learn it. I much prefer it over cervix,” Tasha gave him a playful wink. She observed him quietly for a moment, studying his face. He was rather pleasant to look at when he wasn’t constantly wearing a mask or a scowl. He tended to wear both most of the time, and she wondered what led him to reveal his face around a lot more. Had her jokes gotten the best of him?

“Well I’m still Tasha,” She said with a grin, “No change here,” Tasha shrugged, her drink arriving now. She reached over and took a sip, “I hear you’re quite important nowadays. What’re you doing here with little old me?”

 

[Varyn Rask]

Well, this seemed to be going well. She was smiling at him, but he couldn't tell if that was a result of her having a nice time or thinking he was a hopeless fool. She seemed to find everything entertaining, and he wondered how she had come to that point. So many of the Sith were broody, angry, and... well, kind of like him. Maybe that was why he found her so exciting to be around. She seemed to have a better outlook on life than most.

Her laugh was oddly disarming; it made him feel like he didn't have to worry about the fool he was making of himself, and every one of her words was like she saw right through him. He wondered if she had heard all the other words that went through his head before nice came out. He involuntarily shifted in his seat giving an awkward "heh" sound. It was abundantly clear that he was completely out of his element with this.

In fact, he wasn't sure he'd ever really had a non-business interaction with a woman before. When he was young, there was this one other teen acolyte who he'd developed a crush on, but she'd died during one of their trials. His Lord would have had his hide for "wasting his time" on a girl, and ever since Lord Ralas had died Varyn had just been so preoccupied with work that he'd never gotten around to it. In fact, he wondered if it was secretly because of an internal fear that it would turn out... well, pretty much like this. She would likely notice that he had had a momentary lapse into another world, and realization that he'd never done anything like this floored him, but he snapped back to it quickly, not wanting to be rude and once again horrified that she would have misinterpreted the moment.

Um, yeah, definitely, he said vehemently as she mentioned buying her a drink. Whatever you want, it's on me, he assured her. Wait, that was probably too much. She'd asked for a drink, not for him to open up his whole wallet for her. Was that overzealous? Was he supposed to pay for everything? What was he doing!?

Cerv... he said before sighing and actually managing a half-choked chuckle. That's rude! he teased. Cervix... it didn't sound like that! It's ancient Sith for "raven," and... he said excitedly before stopping short of his complete nerd rant, realizing she probably really didn't care about that at all. Anyway, yeah, Varyn. Nice to see you again, Tasha, he said, with a small, awkward smile.

His importance? That was a precarious line he walked. If he didn't produce results, he'd be executed, and yet he was still here with her instead of working. The thought struck him all at once, and felt strange, but not wrong. You're just... oh great, here came another necessary adjective. Thrilling? Exciting? Captivating? Gorgeous? Completely different than everyone else? ...interesting. Wow, great, so he'd successfully made her sound like a science project. Kriff-wit.

I mean that in a good way, he quickly added, trying to divert away from what was another poorly delivered attempt at a compliment. You seem very comfortable around people, he said, very much in contrast to his own abilities. Do you go on a lot of dates... he asked, and the instant the word left his mouth there was a look of sheer, unadulterated, undeniable, complete horror on his face. Uh... not that that's what this is... that's not what I meant... I just... Kriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiffffffffff.

Um... so how did you find your way... uh... to the Sith? he made a poor attempt at diverting. Everyone's stories were different, and while he was interested, he was far more interested in getting away from the topic he'd accidentally just brought up. He hoped the lighting was dim enough that she couldn't see his face was the color of a fire truck, and he could feel that the skin of his face felt like it was burning.

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

Tasha stared at him, unblinking, as he continued to be incredibly flustered. She was enjoying this considerably, and she leaned back slightly in her seat. She drank from her glass, her fingers lightly tapping against it to the beat of the music playing. Tasha couldn’t help but grin, especially as he physically shifted and fidgeted. He was way out of his element, and she had to wonder why he had even asked to meet. She sipped from her glass again, quirking an eyebrow as he mentioned she could have anything she wanted on his tab, “I’ll hold you to it then.”

She almost choked on her drink from laughing as he explained what Corax meant, “Really? Raven? You are quite literally a walking Holomovie archetype,” She shook her head, the smile still on her face. Tasha paused for longer as he struggled through his next set of commentary. He complimented her first, asked her if she went on dates and then topped it off with how she had found her way to the Sith. They were all questions from all over the place, and she could only stare at him as she calmly sipped from her drink.

“You know, if you want to see me naked that badly, I work at the Lusty Lekku just a few blocks down,” Tasha tossed her hair over her shoulders, “I might even give you a private dance for a discount,” She gave him a playful wink, completely unashamed as she drank her wine. She chuckled at him after that, “So this isn’t a date, eh? So you’re always in the habit for always paying when you go anywhere with a girl? I can respect that - wouldn’t expect it from a Sith.”

She went back to his original question about how she ended up with the Sith. This was the first time there was a change in her expression, her eyes narrowing slightly. It was fleeting, however, and very subtle and almost too light to notice, “Simple - it was my way off Pantora. It was a way to survive, and I’ve been clawing and making my way up since. I also dance now to make ends meet,” Tasha shrugged, swirling the drink in her glass as she gazed at him, “You can cut through the bullshit with me, you know,” She grinned at him, “I’m the type to judge you for it either way, so you may as well not care.”

 

[Varyn Rask]

She seemed to be enjoying this, but more in the way you enjoyed watching your enemies fail than in the "this is a great date" sort of way. Wait, no, this wasn't a date, he once again reminded himself without actually convincing himself.

When she called him a walking holomovie character, he gave her that grumpy, brooding scowl that she would immediately get the impression was the face nearly everyone else got all the time. It was surprising that he'd actually managed to avoid scowling at her this entire time. Probably because he was spending the entire time being way too flustered.

He was about to make a broody, grouchy comment about what she had said when she caught him completely off guard. NAKED?! Deer in headlights. That was the best way to describe the look on his face.

What!? No, I don't want... to see you naked he started to lie, before realizing that it was not only a lie, but also was an insult? Maybe? ...I mean, that's not why I'm... uh... Come on there had to be something he could say to this. As if of their own accord, the mention of her... uh, disrobed caused his eyes for a moment to flash down to that very, very low cut dress before he mentally reprimanded himself and snapped out of that. He didn't want to give the wrong impression, and while, yes, he would very much like to see her... less clothed... that wasn't the only reason he was here. A private dance? His mind momentarily ran away with that idea to places he didn't want it to go, but also really wanted it to go. So that was what she did... he could understand why. I mean, had you seen her? ...that's not what this is all about, he finally managed, though he had no doubt she would find this utterly amusing.

Did he always buy for women? Well, he never went anywhere with women, so he didn't know? That alone probably made this a date. Maybe she wanted it to be a date? Did... you think this was a date? Or... want it to be one? he asked, and the instant he did, he felt like a complete idiot and about ready to just run away from the table altogether.

He wasn't great at reading body movement, but he was much better at reading the Force, and for a moment he felt a flash of something more serious in her when he asked about her past. He thought it must have been a lot of pain and unpleasantness. He listened closely to what she said about clawing her way up, and he understood. His own path hadn't been one to claw out of a bad culture, but to claw his through a life where he was turned into an assassin as a child. He understood what it took to survive, and he had the nightmares to prove it.

He didn't demean her by saying he was sorry because he didn't think she was someone looking for other people's pity. He was going to say something probably stupid before she told him he could be straight with her with a grin.

And was kind of lost on him. He was looking for some hidden meaning to it, and for a moment was just mulling over the words. I... uh... he started speaking before realizing he had literally no idea whatsoever where he was going with this. He was just hoping that if he started talking something ingenious would come out. It didn't.

I wanted to get to know you... he said, for some reason hoping - but not expecting - her to say the same. He really hoped she would feel the same, and somehow felt like he was just putting himself out there, teed up to be kicked off like a football.

And also, you're absolutely gorgeous, he finally just blurted out. He didn't know where it had come from, and he had 0% doubt that she heard that all the time, and he immediately regretted saying it because it risked casting all of this as just him pursuing her - wait, no he wasn't pursuing her! Getting to know her! Just getting to know her! - was based purely on a pretty face and... other assets, which wasn't what this was. Kriffing idiot. You and your foot-shaped mouth, you kriffer. Just have to ruin everything. Kriff!

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

Tasha casually sipped from her drink and watched him, wondering how he ever managed to be so confident in battle when he was an absolute wreck right now. She quirked an eyebrow as he countered her quip of wanting to see her naked, “Oh? So you don’t want to see me naked?” This was entirely too much fun, and she grinned as she swirled the drink in her glass. She gave him a quizzical look, her yellow eyes piercing into him.

When he asked if she wanted this to be a date, she couldn’t help but chuckle softly, “Why not. I don’t mind,” Her voice was as honeyed as ever, and it wasn’t entirely clear if she were actually interested in him or playing some sort of role. It was clear he didn’t do this very often, and Tasha was a hunter by nature. This felt a bit like being the cat playing with a mouse, and she found it oddly thrilling. She was drawn to power, and he certainly had a lot of it, so she didn’t mind the idea of ‘going on a date’ with someone like him.

When he mentioned wanting to get to know her, she was legitimately surprised. It gave her pause, and the smile briefly disappeared from her face. She hadn’t heard that in a long time. Most men weren’t exactly interested in learning more about her, or if they said such things, it was a farce to try and have their way with her. She gazed into his eyes and couldn’t really find anything there to suggest he was fibbing. Tasha said nothing for a moment, using drinking as an excuse not to answer.

“What do you want to know?” She asked finally, brushing over the compliment. She was used to such things, but she certainly wasn’t used to anyone genuinely wanting to know her, “My story isn’t exactly interesting. I’ve got my ambitions, I’ve got my goals just the same as you. What’s my past doesn’t really matter anymore.”

 

[Varyn Rask]

Uh... I just... he said, not really finishing the thought about her being naked. Yes, he would have liked that. Yes, she would be able to figure that out. No, that wasn't what this was all about. No, he didn't know how to handle a question like that. Whatever answer he gave was going to be wrong... or right? She didn't really seem fazed by his answers either way, but it could easily turn out to be him with his foot in his mouth.

So... she was fine with this being a date? Did that mean... He wasn't sure if that meant she was interested in him or if she was just humoring him. Or waiting for an opportunity to do... something to him. He didn't know what it would be, but she was a hunter. It was obvious, and he wondered if he was just her prey.

Are you just... he stopped himself halfway through the question. Was he just going to blurt out that he wanted to know if she was just toying with him? Was that going to accomplish anything? No, no it wasn't. He cleared his throat a moment before looking at her. There was something different about how she looked and acted now. He couldn't take it to mean interest, but for a moment he got the impression that no one had ever cared about her. He couldn't tell if he was wildly off the mark with that, but it was just... a feeling.

What did he want to know? He didn't even know, but he was sure there were a million things. For all intents and purposes he knew nothing about her. Well... um... what does Tasha do with her spare time? he asked. Oh yes, splendid start to conversation. I don't know... I... what do you... he sighed, clearly struggling and unsure how not to ask the cheesy, stupid questions he wanted to ask. Small talk wasn't his strong suit, clearly.

How would you describe yourself? What are you like? he asked. You didn't like me making my own assumptions about you on Moraband, he said, suppressing a smile and remembering that she really hadn't cared for that. He wanted to know what she was really like and if there was any truth to any of his guesses. He just wasn't very good at uncovering the nuggets of truth about a person. Most of his conversations involved more edgy brooding than that.

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

Tasha noticed he didn’t finish a question he was about to ask. She simply stared at him, looking away only when the droid was back and she ordered her second drink. She looked back at Varyn, grinning as he asked what she did in her spare time. She wanted to give him a clever answer that lined up with her dancing, but she held back for whatever reason. Tasha shrugged after the question, looking away for a moment, “I like arranging flowers,” She had to laugh at the revelation. It felt so bizarre to say this out loud. However, it was truly a hobby she enjoyed. Back on her homeworld, she had enjoyed doing it as a child, collecting various different plants and flowers to put them together.

The desert planets of the Old Empire had taken that opportunity away from her, so she had to look extra hard to find any plants. In the end, she had to give it up as a hobby, but it was one of the few things that brought her peace, “I also enjoy cooking,” She shrugged. This one was something she picked up from being on her own since a very young age. Tasha paused then, and then she realized she was supposed to ask him the same thing, “Uh… what do you like to do?” Her second drink arrived and she took a sip from it.

“I’m simply me, Varyn,” Tasha grinned, “There is no real way to describe me. I am as fleeting as the wind, as tumultuous as the oceans, as stubborn as a bantha and I burn hotter than the Tatooine suns,” She laughed then, “How else do you want me to describe myself more than you have observed already. You are good at that, aren’t you? You can come to wrong conclusions, but you can still pick up every little subtle movement and gesture,” Tasha was looking into his eyes now, “And you are trying so hard to do that without diving into my mind and just taking. Taking whatever you want from all the little secrets I have in my mind,” She smiled at him, “Because you are used to getting your way and you are intoxicated because I don’t fit into the mold.”

 

[Varyn Rask]

Varyn's head tilted slightly to the side as he listened to her. Arranging flowers? That was something he hadn't expected at all. She certainly didn't fit the molds of a Sith, and he certainly found that fascinating, but arranging flowers wasn't what he expected. The thought made his mind momentarily run away to another place. They were both something of history buffs, and it made him think about something he'd once read about Andraste.

I read that Andraste had a garden in one of the towers on Korriban... or Moraband, he said, squinting and looking off to the side. He couldn't remember which one, and he didn't even know if it was true, but he'd read it somewhere once. It was one of those pieces of information lodged in his mind that he couldn't quite retrieve its source.

He received another drink of his own, and he took a sip of it. How did you get into flower arranging? he asked. He certainly would not have pegged that as one of her interests, and the revelation made her all the more interesting.

What did he like to do? That was a great question, and as he thought about it more, the more he realized how boring of a person he was. He worked... and that was pretty much it. He trained when he wasn't working, and he prepared when he wasn't training. The realization that he was a complete workaholic suddenly struck him because he'd never really taken the time to ponder it before.

I like history, he finally managed. Even that was indirectly tied to work. He was obsessed with learning about the past so he could apply it to his own plans. And I like to read... he added, realizing just how lame he sounded. I guess, I don't have a lot of spare time, he finally said as his shoulders slumped a little. He really was a desperate workaholic, wasn't he?

Far more interesting than his borderline-obsessive work habits, though, was her description of herself. And her observations about him. She was looking into his eyes, and he into hers, but her eyes were far different than he was used to. The muscles around the eyes still moved, but without the characteristic anatomy of the human eye, it was difficult to decipher. Had he really just said that? "The characteristic anatomy of the human eye?" Not everything was work, Varyn. This overanalyzing was exactly why he was struggling so much.

Her smiles and grins were a shield, and a well practiced one, but he thought he caught hints of the lines around the eyes that indicated that at least some of it was genuine. Perhaps she was genuinely enjoying being with him. She was right about one thing: there was something oddly intoxicating about her. He was fascinated because she didn't fit into any of the molds he had. He was only recently realizing his own tendency to use people, and the assumption that others were using him as well. He hadn't delved into her mind, and in many ways it felt like he was flying blind.

He found himself just staring at her for a moment. His eyes were surprisingly intense and focused, much more than she would have seen from him unless she'd managed to catch his eyes when they'd fought the Jedi together. There was a dangerous fire burning just below the surface as he studied her for a moment. A dozen thoughts ran through his mind as he wondered exactly what it was he was looking for from her. Was she a person he could ever trust? Was he completely out of his depth? Was she someone he would ever understand or be understood by in return? And what was she after?

Almost as quickly as the look had appeared, it was gone. The flash of what lay underneath would linger in her mind, and it was a window into the danger below the surface that even he was afraid of.

So... he started, not even sure where he was going. ...you don't fit any molds, he said, as if musing out loud. He was momentarily distant and far off. Does this mean I have to find out what the Tasha mold is? he asked.

Do you want me to find that mold? he asked almost awkwardly. It was an odd question and not well delivered, but he wanted to know if she had any interest in him continuing his course or if he should simply withdraw into himself. Then he realized... he wasn't sure he cared. He wasn't sure he was willing to merely throw in the towel so easily.

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

She was surprised he knew about minute details like the fact that Andraste had a garden. Tasha couldn’t help but grin, shaking her head, “I didn’t know that, actually,” She admitted, more than a little impressed that he knew that. When he asked how she got into it, she simply gave a half committed shrug. Tasha was not the type to reveal everything about herself so easily, and he would run into barriers wherever he turned. When he moved on to explain that he liked history, she grinned, “I suppose we have that in common.”

She didn’t miss him gazing into her eyes. Still she didn’t feel him try to pierce into her mind, and she knew he was looking into windows that had the shutters drawn. He wanted to pull them back and see the oceans and valleys that existed beyond them. He wanted to gaze for himself and draw to him an understanding that he could use for himself. Yet something held him back, and he didn’t give in, fighting against that little protesting voice in his mind. Tasha smiled as she caught his gaze lingering.

“Careful,” She said quietly, “You don’t want to get lost in a place you can’t come back from,” She remarked the way he looked into her solid yellow eyes. No detail escaped her, and Tasha knew he was going out of his comfort zone. Did he even have a comfort zone? She didn’t break the gaze, her own meeting his just the same, taking in sight of the details of his face, the way his jaw tightened just a bit and the way he sat there stiffly. He was used to always looking over his shoulder for one reason or another, and he was never quite at home anywhere. Tasha kept the observations to herself, “You don’t have to do anything,” She answered his question. His next one brought a small laugh as she sipped from her drink.

“I’d ask yourself what it is that you want to begin with,” Tasha said at last. She finished her drink, looking over to the side. There was a stage here and several scantily clad women climbed on to the cheering of the crowd. The ladies blew kisses at the crowd before they began a dance routine. Tasha grinned at the sight, ordering yet another drink, “That...is another one of my hobbies,” She explained, “Makes me feel very liberated when I’m moving like that. Not having clothes on is also oddly liberating,” Tasha began to laugh at the absurd thought, but it was true.

 

[Varyn Rask]

Varyn Rask was an odd creature in so many ways. He was perfectly comfortable sitting down and dealing with the Dark Lord of the Old Empire or a Grand Moff, he could deal and trade in the fate of the galaxy, but if you put anything in front of him that was personal... something that wasn't a mission, or a goal, or a job to finish, and he was almost like a lost child. His comfort zone was far from here, and he once against found himself struggling against the urge to slip into a business mode. To simply treat this like a negotiation, but he knew - or at least suspected - that anything akin to a personal relationship had to be built on more.

The simple manipulation of others wasn't a foundation to be built on, and it was something Varyn had only recently discovered an aptitude for. No, that wasn't what this was about.

He listened to what she said, measuring every word with consideration. He was looking for the hidden meanings; the explanation behind what was said that might provide a window into that soul that he wanted so desperately to crack. He wondered if he finally did crack it if he would find it a place he couldn't return from. What would it cost him to pursue this woman? He had plans, and even to consider one other person over his goal was to risk utter ruin. Was it worth it?

His thoughts were interrupted as she drew his attention over to the women who had taken to the stage. They began to move in... ways. They were ways that made Varyn entirely uncomfortable, especially when he was on a... date. He diverted his gaze and brought his eyes back to her. She began to explain that that was one of her hobbies, and he was initially... discouraged. He wondered why, though. She'd already told him she danced, and perhaps it made him only question if she was always going to do that for other men to watch and touch.

But then a far more interesting thought crept into his mind. It was a question that seemed to take over the thoughts of how he felt about it and landed on how she felt about it. Liberating. It was an interesting word to describe it, and for a woman who had spent no small amount of time dancing, he assumed it wasn't an off-hand description.

Why? he asked with genuine curiosity in his tone. Curiosity about what made her tick and who she was. He'd said he wanted to get to know her, and he sensed this was a not-so-fleeting part of who she was. The answer to the question was simply an insight into how she viewed the world, and he found himself captivated by the thought of the answer.

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

She didn’t take her eyes off the dancers, “Because when I’m up there, I’m the queen,” Tasha answered without hesitation, “I command attention, I run the show and I have all the power,” She grinned, her mind drifting to her own routine and sets. The eyes that gazed at her hung onto her every little moment, and if she locked eyes with anyone she could practically see them melt into their seats, “It’s no different than the power you feel when you command the Force and feel it rippling through you.”

Tasha had no other way to describe it, finally turning to look back at him. Something about the topic of dancing made him uncomfortable, and she found that curious. She caught him looking at her again, and it confused her to no ends. Was he actually truly curious and interested about her? In her experiences, men always sought one thing from her, and she had always kept it superficial. She didn’t know what alternatives existed, and the way he looked at her almost made her withdraw into herself. There was something almost terrifying about the way he looked at her, the way it lacked the obvious carnal desires that most men looked at her with. With him, there was curiosity and so many other things, most of which she couldn’t place.

She finally rose from her seat, extending a hand out to him, “Come on,” Tasha simply offered him a grin, waiting for him to take the hand. If he did, she would guide him towards the main floor. The music was not too fast or slow, just in the middle and flowy and smooth. She turned to face him, sliding her hands up to rest on his chest as she began to move to music. Tasha could tell he was far out of his element, and it only made her grin, “No rules, no right or wrong answer,” She spoke quietly to him, “Out here you can let go of everything you worry about, the ambitions you have, the fights left to fight, the blood left to shed. All of it can be stripped away like clothing off your shoulders,” Tasha grinned at him teasingly, moving closer to dance near him.

 

[Varyn Rask]

Varyn listened to her not just with his ears, but with his eyes and with the Force. She seemed lost in watching the women on stage, and as she described it, he began to understand why. He could feel the Force weaving between his fingers almost involuntarily, swirling and dancing along the table as he just thought about it. Its power was intoxicating, and he had no doubt that the power she felt when she was onstage was equally as overwhelming. He could understand that much more than he had expected.

When she looked back at him again, he nodded in understanding. Power was something that all Sith sought. Even Varyn did, even if for reasons somewhat different from many, but in recent days, the call for power seemed to have become more pronounced. He wondered if his path to change the galaxy would eventually result in his own ruin. It was likely, but it was a risk he was willing to take.

He was so lost in his own thoughts that he'd completely failed to notice any confusion that emanated from her, and he didn't seem to reengage again until she began to stand. He looked at her and for a moment a look of complete confusion flashed across his face. Was she leaving? Just like that they were finished or... oooh, the connections sunk into his mind.

She extended a hand and for a moment he was left looking at it. She would be able to sense his hesitation, and in an odd way even that single small gesture was a hurdle for him. It was a wall to tear down, and he was entirely unprepared to tear down walls. In his own warped mind, touching had always been associated with killing because that was nearly the only time he ever had contact with another person. Even a simply touch caused him to recoil, but he reached out and slipped his hand into hers. Her touch was delicate, and he suddenly wished he'd not worn gloves. He wished he could have felt her smooth hand in his. He felt an odd rush from even the simplest gesture or touch, and he wasn't sure how to process an all-but-new interaction.

I don't... know about this... he tried to object, but she either didn't hear over the music or didn't care. He let her lead him out to the dance floor until they arrived in the center, surrounded by others who were shifting about and having a wonderful time. Try as he might, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was about to be stabbed by someone from behind. He fought the thought until it was shoved wholly from his mind, and replaced by a single thing:

Her hand on his chest.

If merely taking her hand had been difficult for him, this was a true shock. His hand layered over hers and his whole body stiffened visibly. While it may have appeared romantic to place his hand over hers, it was more a defensive reflex than anything, and one he just couldn't quite squash. It was probably very rude, but he couldn't quite stop himself. She would be able to sense that he was obviously overriding his normal instincts and even more than that, she would feel that his heart - where her hand now lay - was absolutely pounding like a smith's hammer. Boom, boom, boom.

But he didn't pull away.

He couldn't quite take his eyes off of her as she moved, a natural in every way. In fact, she even began to garner the attention of others in the room around them as she moved to the flow of the music. He listened to her over the sound of the music, still watching, mesmerized, at the way she moved.

In stark contrast, there was Varyn.

He was mostly just standing there. His exposure to dancing was... pretty much just watching her right now. As captivating as she was, the most that he really managed was shifting his weight back and forth from foot to foot to what was approximately the beat of the music. Everyone's impressed, he said, forcing a bit of a smile despite his discomfort. He referred to the people who had stopped to watch her dance, but also it was a reference to himself. He'd never seen someone move so amazingly. Every movement was smooth and sultry, and he knew he could have watched her dance for hours. The realization that he had begun to simply stare at her shook him back to reality, and he seemed to stiffen again, eyes widening a bit in that startled way when he realized he'd done something faux pas.

 

[Tasha Blackwell]

She could tell he was tense, and he was awkward in every regard. In many ways she found it endearing, but she wouldn’t say that out loud. She was in her element on the dance floor, and she moved with grace to where people were looking away from the stage and at her. Curiously, these were some of the same gestures she applied in combat, and it was what made her a deadly duelist. With two sabers in her hands, she could whirl around like a dervish and slice through anyone in her path.

Tasha circled back to him, finding him moving from side to side to the best of his ability. She could feel him tense up not only in the Force, but from the way his heart pounded against his chest. Her hands slid up along his chest and up the sides of his neck, the fingers gently tugging at any remnant of his hood that was still clinging to his head. She saw him fully then, catching the way his hair was slightly disheleveld from always having a hood or mask on. Tasha couldn’t help but smile at him, her eyes gleaming as her face was mere inches away from his.

“I’m not concerned with what everyone thinks,” She muttered, moving so they turned and spun. She was leading in the dance, moving with confidence. If he eased into it, even he couldn’t help but move. Tasha kept moving around, feeling the buzz from the drinks hit her. She wasn’t even sure if he had truly had his share of drinks, his focus having been on her. She finally came to a pause and looked up at him.

“So, where to next on our ‘date’?” She gave him a playful wink. Tasha was enjoying herself, a lot of it derived from how out of his element he was. He was stepping out of his comfort zone, and she had to figure out why. The curiosity boggled her mind, and it wasn’t often she came across others that were puzzles for her to solve. Varyn was an enigma in many ways, and she wanted to figure him out.

 

[Varyn Rask]

She really was a natural on the dance floor, and it showed. Everyone's attention was on her, and Varyn was no exception. He felt her hand run along his chest and up to his neck, the feeling sending chills across his whole body. It felt somehow forbidden. Maybe it was that he had spent his entire life avoiding touch, and now he realized just how... enjoyable it could be. But even that pleasure was lined with fear and reservation.

She pulled back his hood and saw hm fully, but he didn't pull back. She leaned in closer to him and their faces were only inches away. He could smell the alcohol on her breath from here and he found himself staring into those unflinching yellow eyes. He was so close he could see his reflection in them. She had that smile on her face, and at this distance he could not only see, but feel that it was genuine.

She began to move while still holding him and he didn't resist her. Despite having something of two left feet on the dance floor, he wanted to impress her, but it mostly just turned into him trying to avoid stepping on her feet. Luckily footwork was an element of swordsmanship, which was something Varyn knew very well, and his feet adeptly evaded hers despite a few narrow calls.

And then the song ended, and they were both staring at one another again. There was something intoxicating about it that threatened to overwhelm him. Each time they came into this proximity he found himself not wanting to leave. He found himself not wanting to end it and just stay there forever. He was shaken out of it as she asked where to next on their date, and he realized he had no idea. Despite trying to cover it up, she would see the momentary flash of panic on his face. He - who planned for every contingency - hadn't planned for this.

Come on, he said, hand sliding down her arm until his hand found hers. Gloved or not, the sensation of holding her hand was exhilarating for him. There was something about the situation she would likely find hysterical, but he was almost like a middle school boy holding a girl's hand for the first time and excited to be walking around the mall with her.

He headed for the door after throwing some credits down for their drinks and they were back out in the streets shortly. But it was the streets of Nar Shaddaa, and an attempt at a romantic walk was... not great. Kriff. He wanted to buy himself some time to think of what they could do next, so he kept walking and talking in an attempt to keep her distracted. She would see through that fairly easily....

So... what would you be doing tonight if I weren't here? he asked as he began to lead them toward the pricier part of town. The streets - even if they were Nar Shaddaa - began to turn nicer. People were dressed better and streets were lined with shops that looked expensive. Plus there was security everywhere... the kind that kept ruffians out. Varyn appeared unconcerned with them.