Open Ajan Kloss Seeking guidance

[Giran Latt]

ker-plunk
Giran sat on the banks of a large lake trying and failing to skim pebbles across the surface. He couldn't even do that right. By now everyone had heard about the Hutts bounty and the follow up announcement by the sector rangers. The whole temple would be abuzz with activity. Giran on the other hand had come out here... To sulk.

His father had disowned him after the Hutts broadcast and his mother hadn't said a thing. He'd screamed and bellowed and cursed and she'd just stood there and watched. The only people he had left now were the Jedi and they had bigger fish to fry right now. He'd thought about talking to master Mi'la but she'd actually encountered these sith, she didn't need to hear about his personal problems. So, instead of bother anyone with this news Giran had come out here. It had rained twice so far as jungles tended to do but it wasn't cold so Giran had stayed.

Ker-plunk

His father had never really wanted him anyway, he'd always resented that he was force sensitive. He hated the force with a fiery passion. Which, for a mirialan, was very odd. His mother though, his mother had loved him he was sure. Why had she abandoned him too then? It wasn't fair none of this was fair. He hadn't killed that hutts son, why was he being punished! Why did he have a bounty on his head, he'd only ever wanted to help people. Giran wiped the moisture from his eyes and threw another stone.

Ker-plunk
useless

OOC: Open to anyone who thinks they might be able to give Giran some advice or just wants a more subdued conversation about the recent events.

 

[Oren Zapan]

​

Everything around them seemed to be thrown into chaos. Activity was at an all time high and information was flying left and right. There was so much commotion, so many emotions, it was a lot to take in, even for a Knight. He had hid the information from his younglings, but he couldn't imagine how the padawan's were handling it all. To see the world crashing down upon them, it was hurtful, and Oren wasn't really sure how to fix it.

He stepped outside and went for a walk to clear his mind and hopefully find a sign from his master about the whole situation, and so he walked upon the twisting trailhead, past the river that he trained with his class. A simpler time. He would continue to walk, making his way towards the old lake that his ship had been sunken into. Through his help and guidance, Nara was able to get it out, and they grew together that day. This was his happy place, somewhere where he could get away and just remember the good things and the bad things.

But today he wouldn't be alone. He would see Giran sitting along the bank, tossing stones into the murky water. He would slowly approach his hands folded behind his back, "Hey kiddo," hey'd say in a gentle voice, "Everything alright?"

 

[Giran Latt]

Giran jumped slightly at the new voice and hastily dried his eyes. He jumped up turning to the newcomer a lie springing to his lips.
"I was just here..."
He noticed it was Oren and stopped. Nearly anyone else in the order and he'd have made up some excuse but Oren had always been kind to him.
"I was just thinking master." He sighed sitting back down.
He tried to skip another stone.
Ker-plunk
"All this news, it's all a bit much, my family called and well... They told me to come home now or to never come home."
Maybe he should go home, he hadn't felt much use here so far. All his achievements at the order thus far had come on the backs of the other more adept padawans: Nara, Hirani, Brahe...
"It's all just a bit overwhelming and I just feel so... So... So helpless I suppose..." He trailed off feeling the hot angry tears threatening to take over again.

 

[Mila Tesara]

Mila had sensed something amiss in her padawan not too long ago, and was kicking herself for not trying to find him earlier now. As she went with her instinct, she found herself being led upon a trail, and felt two familiar presences up beyond where her vision failed her. It was a difficult time for the young man, given all that had occurred recently, and pared with the fact that his parents hadn't approved of his choice to become a jedi to begin with, she expected. Perhaps she was over her head, having taken three padawans was perhaps too much, but she knew all to well that young jedi needed guidance, and she felt that perhaps this method be for the best. She could only hope that she wasn't wrong. Following alongside the river, it didn't take long for her to happen upon her padawan, and Master Oren, and at once she felt relief flush over herself, knowing that her student hadn't run off. "Giran!" Mila called out, as she walked with a bit of speed into her step, but as she came closer she gave Oren a small nod. "Master Oren, it's nice to see you once again." She commented, before standing by her padawan's side. Seeing the tears welling up in her padawan's eyes, she knelt down beside him, wrapping him in a hug. She only suspected the source of his pain, but did not seek to prod at it in fears of making it worse. "If you are wondering if you still belong here, you will always have a place within the order. Don't ever question that." She whispered, hoping for only her padawan to hear. She knew all too well the struggle with family,

 

[Giran Latt]

Kriffing hell, they both found him! He needed to find a better hiding spot. At least it was these two. He hadn't wanted to bother Mi'la at all she had so much on her plate, she didn't need her sniveling padawan to worry about too and he was doing more than sniveling now. He was bawling his eyes out into her shoulder.
Stupid stupid
"I just... I don't... I'm sorry"
He needed to pull himself together, this was no way for a jedi to act. He was a jedi, after all Master Mi'la had said so. He pulled away embarrassed, took a few calming breathes and turned to address them both.
"Sorry surely both of you are very busy... I'm just... Just worried about my place in all this...and I just always thought if I wasn't good enough I could go home... But now I can't and I'm just scared I can't do it..." Giran told them haltingly trying to hide his sobs. That was the crux of it Giran just didn't feel good enough not now that every jedi was needed to pull there own weight. He was going to let someone down.

 

[Oren Zapan]

​

Oren couldn't help, but feel a bit of sadness at the boy's words; To think one could lose their family over who they were as a person, for the actions of one? It wasn't right in his mind, but he understood where they were coming from. The Jedi had been painted as monsters to the rest of the galaxy by a hutt and some corrupted individual looking to gain for himself.

He would place a hand on the boy's shoulder, "I understand the confusion," he'd say softly, "To be honest I feel the same way..our version of the order has not faced this ordeal, but like all the Jedi before us, I know we will prevail, the light will continue to flicker even in great darkness."

He would peer towards the sky, "You will always be a Jedi, you carry the code within your heart, and I understand if you need to return home to be with them." He'd say with a sigh, "or you can stay and prove to the galaxy, to your parents, to yourself that you aren't what this man has painted us to be."

He would turn towards the familiar sound of a twi'lek's voice, his brown eyes would shift to catch Mila's lavender skin reflecting in the sunset. His eyes would focus for a short bit on her before peering down, "Mila," he'd say softly.

tag: @Algarus @TRook

 

[Mila Tesara]

Mila offered a small smile towards her fellow knight, giving him a small nod. It was nice to know her padawan was in capable hands, but Giran was still her responsibility; her padawans were her family as far as she was concerned, and no mother would leave her child in such a state. She only hoped she didn't come off on overbearing, sometimes compassion could be mistaken for obsessive after all.

She could understand Giran's grief, after all, he had hinged his bets on this, and feeling like he was locked into a path he himself felt unsure of, especially for one so young, it was understandable to feel panic. When she had went on this path, she had been alone for close to four years, but if she wished to stop her jedi training she still had a ship and a career to return to. Her young padawan on the other hand had no such fortune. He tried to persuade her that they were both too busy to help, which she didn't buy for a second; she was his master, it was her job to be here for moments like this. "I'm busy being your master, and as my padawan, this is my responsibility. So don't feel like you're taking up our time dear." Mila asserted, looking to Oren for a show of support. "You are a jedi Giran, and this doubt is something we all struggle with. Even I question my standing at times, but it is overcoming that, surpassing that fear, that helps you reach your potential." She said, attempting to soothe the emotional wounds of her padawan. She looked back to Giran, pulling the young man back so she could look at him. "You will always have a place here, even if you decide this path isn't for you. The order is your family Giran, and we will not cast you out." She hoped her words were effective, at times she found her own pragmatism prevented her from hitting the mark, she only hoped that this time this wouldn't be the case.

@TWD26 @TRook

 

[Giran Latt]

Giran looked to the two masters and found comfort there. He realised something that all people realise at some point in their lives, no one is truly certain of themselves. He saw the doubt that both had expressed about there own place in the galaxy. He saw that they too had insecurities and anxieties. He also saw the hope they both held in their hearts and knew them as teachers and elders that had shown him so much about the Jedi and life. These people were truly wise, not because they knew the answers, but because they fought for them anyway.

Oren was right he couldn't go home and abandon his family, he'd always known that in his heart. He couldn't let this man slander the name of the only people that cared for him. He may not be strong enough now but he would learn. Mi'la was right too, he was a jedi. Being a jedi didn't mean waving around a lightsaber, lifting rocks with your mind and giving sage advice. It meant supporting those you could and working towards those you couldn't. They were all a family.

"I'm going to get stronger." Giran said steadying his voice.
"I'm not strong now, I'm scared... really scared but I wont let you both down." Giran said his voice getting stronger
"I don't want to let anyone down anymore." He finished firmly.

He hugged his master. The kindest person he'd ever met and maybe the stupidest. Imagine taking on three padawans. Then he stood up and hugged Oren. It felt a little awkward but the man was a good teacher and truly cared for everyone in the order, he deserved some appreciation. He pulled away and scratched his head awkwardly.

"So, the sith really are back, force."