One Ends, One Begins

[Darth Kravos]

Kravos was still more shaken by Cregan's death than he would ever admit to anyone. The Dark Lord had a reputation to uphold, but the reality was that things just weren't the same. Cregan had been one of the few people he trusted. He was sure that the death would be hitting Andraste as well. The strange multi-marriage had always been strange, but they had both lost a piece of themselves.

Perhaps it was for that reason that Kravos made his way to Lothal. He'd never been much for the loving, cuddly, family routine, but with Cregan gone, Kravos certainly wasn't going to rely on Siris for that. He had respect for Siris, but he wasn't the warm type.

He didn't announce himself or even wear armor, instead appearing in regular clothing with only a single concealed lightsaber to even identify him as a Force user. He'd arrived at the house only to find his wife gone, so he'd used his old Shadow skills to track down his wife to a small market not far away in town.

He could sense her presence even from a distance, and he didn't doubt she would sense his... if he'd not done something about it. With little need for true combat here, he'd suppressed his presence in the Force and, although still alert, made his way to find his wife without warning.

These must be the little ones I've heard so much about, he said. He knew that Andraste had always kept the kids away from him, and he could understand why. A part of him even wondered how she would handle him appearing here without warning, silently wondering if she would ask him to leave. In a way the possibility was sad, but it was the path he had chosen.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste was still numb. Merely days had passed since the death and she was in denial. She had spent the time sobbing on the floor of the lake house, clutching Cregan’s clothing to her face. She felt weaker than ever, cursing herself for having human emotions. For once she could understand why the Jedi forbade emotions. This was pain beyond anything she had ever felt, and she never wanted to feel this again. She had locked herself up for long enough to where she had begun to neglect her children.

At last, she had Elix and Lyanna brought over, doing her best to ignore the boy’s constant inquiries about ‘Creggy’. The only remnant of Cregan that remained were the earrings he had gotten her that could emulate his touch so long ago. She replayed it over and over again, imagining that he was still here. However, after enough time, she knew it was fruitless. He was gone and Andraste could never bring him back. It didn’t matter how powerful she was.

She had taken the kids to a nearby market after Elix constantly nagged her about boredom. She couldn’t blame the boy, he was still a toddler in the end. She was at a small park in between shops, Lyanna in her arms while Cregan played in the grass across from her. There was a pond nearby and he was watching a toy ship float in the water, nudging it along with the Force.

Andraste’s thoughts were far away, her eyes more sunken than ever. She was so out of it that she didn’t even notice Kravos arriving. She jerked her head to the side to look, shaken out of her stupor. Andraste looked as if she hadn’t slept in days, and she hadn’t. Her hair was a mess and skin was chalk white. She invited Kravos to sit next to her.

“Elix is not so little anymore,” She muttered quietly, looking out at the boy, “With a father so tall, I think he’ll start to look pretty imposing soon,” She managed a faint smile, looking down at Lyanna, “He’s not entirely gone, you know…” She traced her finger along the baby’s cheek, “He lives through her..”

 

[Darth Kravos]

Kravos had known Andraste for years, longer than anyone she still kept in contact with, and he had never seen her like this before. As soon as he saw her, he knew that she hadn't slept for days... probably not since they had last seen one another. He'd spent the time readying for the attack on Tython, and everything was now set up. He knew he needed to see his wife.

He walked over, lowering himself to the ground and taking a seat next to her, looking at the little girl in her arms as Andraste spoke about Cregan living on. He could see it in her and he could sense it in her. She had that same smile when he looked down at her that Cregan had always had.

The Dark Lord made no claim to be a wonder with kids, and he felt more than a little out of his element. He knew that Andraste had intentionally kept her children from him, and that made it all the more uncomfortable. He stuck a finger out and the baby quickly grabbed it.

His other arm wrapped around Andraste and pulled her to lean against his chest. He was sure Cregan would have known precisely what to say to her to make her feel better, but the truth was that Kravos was terrible husband material and when she needed him most, he was likely to fail her. But he could be there for her. He wanted to say something to make her feel better, but there wasn't anything he could say.

I can see him in her, he said. He knew that if the tables had been turned, Cregan would have looked after whatever children Kravos had had. Perhaps he owed it to his friend to do the same. I'll help you with them, he said in his very matter-of-fact way that wasn't exactly warm, but meant well.

You need to sleep, he admonished, knowing that she hadn't slept for days and couldn't go on in this way. The Empire would need her, Kravos would need her, but more than that, her children would need her.

 

[Andraste]

She didn’t know how he’d react to being around both kids. Kravos didn’t strike her as the type to be good around kids, not with his lack of patience. However, when she looked at him, there was a softness in his gaze she almost didn’t recognize. It was a sliver of Kal in there and it brought her a surprising amount of comfort. Andraste let him sit next to her, leaning slightly into his shoulder as he held her. Lyanna squirmed in her arms and blinked up at this new figure that arrived. The baby was used to Elix or Cregan’s face looming above her at all times, but Kravos was a face she didn’t recognize.

Andraste smiled at his words, “She’ll have his smile, I already know,” She leaned down to kiss the baby on the forehead. She shook her head at his next words, “How can I sleep? I’ve never experienced pain like this. It feels as if a part of me has been cut and torn out. I don’t know how much more I can cry,” Her voice was slightly hoarse, and it was clear she had been bawling nonstop. Andraste clutched Lyanna tightly to her chest, “She will grow up never knowing her father. She will never see his smile…” She closed her eyes, “I feel like a light has permanently been extinguished in our family.”

It was no secret that both Kravos and Siris were broody. Both men were reclusive and mostly grim. Cregan had livened things up with his bubbly nature. Even in the darkest of times he was always her light, and now he was forever gone. Andraste shook her head, “No…I can’t sleep. I’ll need to lean on you for a while,” She rested her head against him, keeping her eyes closed, “I will count on you. I want the Jedi gone, Kal,” She took shuddering breaths, tears now flowing, “They’re like insects I simply can’t stamp out. The moment I think they’re gone, they scurry back up and cause so much damage.”

There was anger in her voice, rage pulsating within her through the Force, “I want them gone for good.”

 

[Darth Kravos]

Theme​

He could tell that every word brought pain to his wife, and he would have liked to stop it, but he knew he couldn't. Even time wouldn't heal the wound that had been left behind, just form a scab. She would carry it for the rest of her life, but that didn't mean she had to carry it alone. He didn't have the eloquent or encouraging words that Cregan would have had, but what he had he would offer her.

Lean on me for as long as you need to, he said, looking out across the grass. He saw Elix running around, enjoying life and mostly oblivious to the realities that his mother was facing. He had seen her through everything from a scared Jedi girl to an Empress, but there was maybe no point where he could do less to help her than now. Even at her trial, he'd chosen to stand by her, but that was different. That wasn't bringing someone back from the dead.

I'm going to find a way to bring him back, he said in his monotone voice as if he'd just said he was going to get dinner and not resurrect the dead. But what he said in that voice, happened. And I'll burn everything in this galaxy to the ground to root out the Jedi, he promised her. The words alone were a glimpse into that dark and terrifying man that he was, and there wasn't so much as a flinch at the thought of wiping out an entire religion.

I won't stop until they're gone. Plans are already underway, he said, turning to look at her with those glowing amber eyes that were ever a pool of darkness now punctuated by the rage he felt about his best friends death. But when they looked at her, that rage was held back and not a drop of it poured out.

And I'll help you with them if you need, he said, also knowing that there was a distinct possibility that she wouldn't want him to. He knew that whether she would admit it or not, she saw him as a monster. It was impossible not to with the things he had done. Or not, he added.

The reality was that no matter how thin it stretched him, he was always there for her. Whether the struggle was family, Empire, or the most trivial of tasks, he was always someone she could count on. He had been from the first day they'd met... a lifetime ago and an entire person ago.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste found comfort in his words, but her eyes shot open when he mentioned bringing Cregan back. She straightened up and turned to look at him, “What are you talking about?” She asked him sharply, her eyes narrowed suddenly. She knew he dabbled in a lot of things she didn’t approve of, like abominations. Did he intend to bring back some warped version of Cregan stitched together like some sort of monster? The warning look in her gaze would be enough to get across just how she felt about it.

It was then that Elix came waddling back, slowing down as he came across the scene before him. He blinked suspiciously at Kravos, clutching onto Andraste’s dress as he looked up. Kravos would pick up on the striking silver eyes at once, and see the same eyes that Siris had. The boy’s other features resembled closer to Andraste herself.

Elix turned back to look at her, pouting angrily, “Why Creggy still hiding? I count. I wait and he still hiding!” She felt a lump grow in her throat and she had to bite her lip, “Elix, meet Uncle Kal,” Elix forgot about his complaints and looked at Kravos, still eyeing him suspiciously, “Come on, come say hello, don’t be rude,” Elix blinked a few times and stepped forth before he waved dramatically, “Hiiii I’m Elix and I’m four!” He held up as many fingers to make his point.

Andraste smiled at her son, turning to Kravos, “They’re really amazing. He’s growing up so fast, I can barely keep up. It seems like just yesterday he was a little bundle like Lyanna,” Elix was grumpy at this, “She’s little! I’m big!” Andraste’s smile widened, “Of course you are.”

 

[Darth Kravos]

Fine, so Kravos probably shouldn't drop bombs like that if he wasn't going to explain exactly what he meant. He could see the fire in her eyes, but he also didn't flinch away. There was a fiery intensity there that showed he wasn't going to back down. In fact, he would almost certainly need her help. She had a grasp of the Force that was one of the only ones in the galaxy that surpassed his own. He didn't know how they would do it, but he was convinced it could be done. He and Cregan had gone to a cave on Korriban where a woman had lived for unknown time in a cave and become part of the stone. That area alone might unlock some of the secrets they needed.

Before they could get further, the little one came wandering over, grasping onto his mother and looking warily at Kravos who had to remind himself that in this instance, he didn't need to stare the little boy down. The comment about where "Creggy" was hiding was enough to make Kal feel as though he'd been punched in the gut. Andraste would likely notice Kravos's very subtle stiffening at the question.

The Dark Lord managed a small smile that grew a bit more as Elix proudly declared he was four and held up his fingers. I'm Uncle Kal. I'm good friends with your mommy, daddy, and Uncle Creggy. Wow, you've really grown up, haven't you Elix? You're looking out for mommy? he asked, glancing over at his petite wife who ironically had no need of any kind of protection.

He wondered if Andraste had ever mentioned Uncle Kal before or if this was something completely out of right field for the young boy. How separated had she kept them from the idea of who and what Kravos was? He decided not to focus on that and instead turn to entertaining the little boy. You're just going to have to thumb-war me to prove you are strong enough to protect mommy, he said with every intention of throwing there little competition. He wondered if the boy had inherited his parent's determined nature.

 

[Andraste]

Elix lit up at the mention of Cregan, “Do you know where he is? Do you?” The boy eagerly ran over to Kravos, “I will play all day! Just tell where Creggy hiding!” He was jumping up and down in excitement at this point. He extended his hand over to play, his tiny fingers minuscule next to Kravos’s hand. Andraste had to look away, focusing on Lyanna. She had to collect herself before she looked at Kravos again, surprised by this side of him. She had always known him to be very broody and withdrawn. She had expected him to be very uncomfortable around Elix and Lyanna, and she certainly would have chosen a less public place to have their meeting. Kravos didn’t do the best out near crowds.

Andraste idly watched them play for a moment, her gaze on Kravos for a long moment, “I’m sorry for not introducing you earlier..” She felt a pang of guilt at the thought, “I judged you harshly. I didn’t think…” She let the sentence trail off. He knew her well enough to know exactly what she had been thinking. Andraste stood up from the bench and nodded for them to follow, carrying Lyanna with.

“Cregan was the Prince of Lothal,” Andraste said quietly as she strode towards the market. The shops were crowded and teeming with life, children were running and playing and people were laughing. It was a very busy square, and it was livelier now than before when Cregan took over. She gazed out at it all, shaking her head, “It falls to Lyanna now,” She glanced down at the small baby, fast asleep in her arms.

“I will need to appoint a regent,” Andraste’s tone grew slightly methodical again, “Then I will have to rally the council and…” She rattled things on and on, clearly trying to distract herself from the situation.

 

[Darth Kravos]

Kravos watched Elix jumping around expectantly and it made even the heartless Sith Lord sad. He already missed his friend and the thought that he would never see him again. He would never come back to enliven the life of this little boy who had grown to love him.

No need to apologize, he said. Yes, it hurt him a bit, but it wasn't like he hadn't done his share to solicit that outlook. He'd become the Empire's top enforcer and a terror to the whole galaxy. Even Andraste was afraid of him on some level, who could blame her for not wanting him around her children. I didn't help your view of me, he said, opting not to address the issue further.

A moment later, he glanced up to see the people bustling around the area. Cregan loved this world, he said, thinking back to all the big plans he had for it. All the work he had put in to become the "Prince of Lothal" and even the time that Kravos had to face off against Evalyn for the second time. He'd never told Andraste about that and wondered if Cregan had. If not, he wouldn't now.

She'll grow up to be a good ruler. We'll help her, he said. There was no denying that whoever or whatever he was, he felt an obligation to help his friend's daughter succeed now that he was gone.

He wanted to kiss her to stop her from rambling, but he wasn't sure exactly how that worked with the kids, so instead he reached out and touched the side of her face. Am I allowed to kiss you? he planted the thought in her mind with the faintest of a smirk. He didn't normally ask permission for such things, but with the kids around, he thought he should keep some sort of a lid on himself. With her affirmation, he leaned forward and kissed her quickly before leaning back.

I've always been there for you. I can handle things for as long as you need. I'm just worried about you, he said, and it was the truth. He'd lied about it before, and he'd changed over time, but she was always the reason he was here. He could lie to himself all he wanted, but she was the reason he'd left the Jedi, and he would stand by her side through anything. What do you need? he asked. Besides a cinnamon roll?

 

[Andraste]

Andraste had to bite her lip as Kravos mentioned how Cregan loved this world. Referring to Cregan in the past tense was absolutely surreal, and it brought a sharp pang of pain in her chest each time. She simply couldn’t process it, and she had to stop what she was saying. Thankfully, his next words asking for permission to kiss her caught her off guard. Andraste simply stared at him with mild surprise and amusement, not used to him being nervous about this. She leaned into him, meeting his lips for a quick kiss.

“EWWWWW!” Elix sang out in a chorus, resulting in an eye roll from Andraste as she pulled away. He turned away and was immediately distracted by the market, leaving her shaking her head, “He’s going to be such a pain,” She muttered, though she couldn’t keep the smile off her face. Andraste turned to Kravos as he asked what she needed. The mention of a cinnamon roll brought a bigger smile, “Oh Kal….those days seem like so long ago,” She thought back to when they met up at restaurants and he always had a cinnamon roll waiting. It had extended even back to when she was a young Jedi Knight that was so naïve and still stood vehemently against killing anyone.

“I want you to hold her,” She handed Lyanna over to Kravos, showing him how to hold a baby. It was a very strange gesture, especially as this was the man singlehandedly responsible for countless deaths and destruction. Lyanna remained fast asleep, curling her tiny hands against his chest if he held her close. Andraste eyed him curiously, “Having a child changes you, you know. For the longest time I thought I could never love anything more than this empire I’ve built. That was until I gazed upon my baby for the first time and it shattered everything I knew about everything. I would die a thousand times over for both of them.”

 

[Darth Kravos]

Kravos had the faintest smirk as Elix burst out at how gross it was that the two were kissing. Someday, Andraste would be wishing for the days when he thought that kissing was gross.

An eternity, he nodded in agreement. He didn't even feel like the same man anymore. Kal Vox really had died, with only a few lingering pieces for Andraste. The parts that still managed to find a cinnamon roll or thumb wrestle her thumb.

He was still thinking back in time when his wife said she wanted him to hold the baby. The look on his face had to have been comical as the deer-in-headlights face set in. But he didn't decline, and he didn't want to. It was a level of trust that she was placing in him, and he recognized that.

He put his arms out, mimicking what she did as he let the baby's head rest against his arm, holding her cradled in his lap. She reached out and wrapped a tiny little hand around his shirt, and even Kravos had to wonder at it. Andraste and Cregan had created a tiny little life. The Dark Lord had always been a proficient destroyer, but this was something else. Andraste loved her children dearly.

Are you afraid to have a child with me? he asked in a manner that could be construed as just shy of blurting it out. It wasn't said in an accusatory tone at all but he wasn't actually looking at her when he said it as his eyes were still locked on the tiny baby in his arms.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste watched him as he took the baby, observing the way he was surprisingly delicate. It was quite endearing to watch, and she couldn’t help the smile that came on her face. Lyanna was drawn to him at once, nuzzling and curling into him. Andraste glanced down and Elix was by her again, once again with his suspicious expression as he looked up at Kravos holding his sister. She gazed fondly at Kravos for a long moment, “Look at you, you’re a natural,” It was strange to see him like this. For as long as she had known him, he had always been very serious. This extended back to even during her Jedi days when he was a serious Jedi Shadow. To see him now at the mercy of a tiny infant was entertaining.

His question caught her completely off guard, and it felt like a jab to her stomach. She looked at him in surprise, completely thrown off by the abrupt switch in topics. Andraste had been very much focused on Cregan and her own despair, this new question stopping her line of thoughts. He had never before broached the topic of children, even when she had Elix and then Lyanna. It was the first time he had referred to children in a context that included him and Andraste had to run his question in her mind a few times to make sure she heard him correctly.

“I’m..” She was fumbling over her words, “I’m not afraid, but I understood that you never wanted children,” He had her full attention now, and Andraste was clearly shaken from this topic, “Your love for the Empire is surpassed only by your love for me, and I never thought you left any room for children. This was especially true when you first became Kravos and you made it clear to me just who you were,” Andraste stepped closer to him, running her fingers through Lyanna’s light wisps of hair, “Why are you asking me this now?”

 

[Darth Kravos]

He could tell that his question had taken her by surprise, and why shouldn't it have? He had never asked something like that before, never brought it up before, and certainly had pulled it abruptly out of the air. It had been a hard deviation from their prior topic, but he had always been direct and unafraid to address a topic head on.

When she asked him why he was asking her, he paused for a moment. There were any number of reasons he could have said, and putting it into words wasn't easy. He tried to think of how to say it without being overly blunt. He took the time to decide precisely what he wanted to say so that there was no hesitation when he finally spoke up. I'm never going to leave you. I've made that clear before, but seeing the way you love these children. If something ever did happen to me, I want you to still have a piece of me, he said. It was likely a terrible explanation, and on top of that, he had no intention of dying any time soon, but it was a piece of the puzzle.

The Empire has been our child, he went on to say, and it was true. The two of them had built it from the ground up, and it was much more his child than it had ever been Cregan's or Siris's. But the Empire won't need that much attention forever. It's going to mature very soon, and I'd like us to have something else as well, he said, finally looking up at her. His eyes weren't exactly what you would call soft, but they also seemed to lack the animalistic undercurrent that was so common when he spoke of anything else. Still dangerous, but not to her. Never to her.

Would you have a baby with me? he finally just asked in his typically direct fashion. Perhaps... no, not perhaps, it was definitely a terrible time to ask on the heels of Cregan's death, but maybe that had been the push he needed to reevaluate his life and priorities a bit. He didn't want his wife to be at an arm's distance anymore. He would never be able to fully settle down into a civilian life, and he would always be a dangerous man, but as the Empire's grasp expanded, the need for him to be the violent person lessened also. His plans were already being laid to wipe the Jedi from the galaxy, and then they might have peace, freedom, justice, and security.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste heard him out as he laid out his reasons for bringing up the topic of children. She was surprised he was even thinking along those lines, and her immediate thought was alarm, “What do you mean something happen to you…what are you intending to do?” There was suspicion in her voice. Her mind immediately began to run scenarios that ended with his death. Was he trying to preserve a part of him knowing he was going somewhere he wasn’t coming back from?

“I can’t take it if you plan on risking your life,” Andraste admitted, watching the way he held Lyanna and meeting his gaze. He had the yellow eyes of someone entirely lost to darkness, and yet even then she could see tenderness there. She knew it existed only for her, so could it ever extend to someone else? Andraste stepped closer to them, pain in her own eyes as she thought about the reality of the roles they played. There would always be danger, always be challenges that threatened their lives.

She was taken aback by how blunt his question was, especially as she was still reeling from Cregan’s death. Andraste was silent for a moment, collecting her thoughts, “I don’t want to have a baby simply for those reasons, Kal. I had Elix and Lyanna because they were created from the desire to have a family and build upon the love I had with Siris and Cregan,” She paused there, knowing how neglectful Siris had been. In the end, it only created more strife. Andraste knew Cregan would be different, but he was gone now, “Are you sure you’re not wanting this simply because I have children with my other husbands?” She quirked an eyebrow, knowing she was asking him the difficult questions now.

 

[Darth Kravos]

Kravos shook his head as she asked if he was planning to risk his life. It was partially true, but he wasn't planning to do anything more dangerous than usual. She'd asked him to make war against the Jedi and he'd been charged to do so long before Cregan's death. He would continue to do that, and he didn't plan on dying in the process.

I'm not leaving you, he reminded her. He'd told her that many times before, and the same held true now. He'd been with her through everything and fought in battles across the galaxy. He wasn't going to let the war take him that easily.

But he was a bit disappointed when she said that she didn't want to have a child. Or for said she didn't want to have one for those reasons? He paused a moment and didn't say anything as he looked at her. He could tell that she had been hurt before and he didn't say anything for a moment. He wasn't sure he could say that the answer to her question was definitively "no" but it wasn't the entirety of his reason either.

You don't want to have something with me besides the Empire? he asked, referring to what he had just said. He hadn't directly answered her question, and the idea of family was foreign to him, but he knew he wanted their relationship to be stronger. Perhaps that was the wrong reasons to want to have a child, but he was making an effort. He'd done what he could to extend himself to her time and again, but it seemed there was always some insurmountable wall that kept them apart.

I'm tired of there being a gap between us, he admitted, I don't want to be just Empress and Dark Lord. Despite the two of them being married, there was still always something about their relationship that never quite felt like a family. That wasn't what he wanted anymore. I want us to have a child because I want us to have something more, he said. If she couldn't accept that then perhaps she couldn't accept that, but he wasn't going to pretend it was anything different.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste shook her head as he repeated that he wasn’t leaving her. That wasn’t true, and she knew it. In order to actually further the empire and help eradicate the Jedi, he had to leave. He had to be out there in the field and he had to oversee the attacks personally. She wanted to argue with him, but he kept going by proving to her that he missed her point entirely. Why did she have so much trouble communicating with him? Her jaw tightened as he spoke, her eyes narrowing.

“Are you hearing yourself right now? You are acting like a child is a prop to simply introduce because you want to have something other than the Empire. It’s not that simple. You have to be around to be a father, you have to be a role model, you have to be someone the child aspires to be,” Her voice grew stronger as she spoke, and she wiped away her tears from earlier, “Remember what you said to me when I first found you in your quarters and when you first took up the name Kravos. Remember why you wanted to have a home for just us away from everything. It was so you could be dark, it was so you could embrace just how far you had fallen. Are you ready to present that in front of a child? Are you ready to be a guiding figure for a child?”

Andraste crossed her arms, watching him. Lyanna was squirming now, looking irritated and as if she were about to burst out crying, “I do want a child with you, but you need to stop acting like a child yourself and take the time to understand where I’m coming from. I never said no and you immediately jumped to conclusions. You have become dark and ruthless and there’s no proof that you will be any different with a child suddenly in the mix. Children make everything exponentially more difficult. Siris is learning that and Cregan will never know it.”

 

[Darth Kravos]

Kravos could feel the anger growing within her as she spoke. It was incredible that they had known each other for so long and yet still had so much trouble communicating with one another. He didn't say anything as she spoke. He didn't interrupt, and for some reason, he didn't find anger rising within him. The two of them had had some ugly fights, but for some reason, this one didn't seem to elicit that.

There was a part of him that wanted to jump to being angry and escalate things, but that would have directly defeated the purpose of what he was trying to do. Lyanna was squirming in his arms now, and Kravos was left with the ramifications of that. She reached up and grabbed at his beard and he gently removed her hand. You're going to make her cry, he said. He was tempted to use the Force to calm her, but as it wasn't his daughter, it felt oddly like overstepping his bounds.

He waited until he'd begun to calm the young girl before addressing what Andraste had said. The problem was, he didn't have a good answer. Perhaps that was testament to her argument. You've known me for a long time. You've seen me change for the worse, and you know I don't like to lose. I avoid things I'm not good at or work until I'm exceptional at them, he said, beginning to feel as though he was rambling. Love, I'm completely out of my element with this, he finally confessed, looking her dead in the eye.

But that doesn't mean I don't want to try, he said. He half-expected that to make her mad in some way as well, but that didn't mean he was shying away, and hopefully it wouldn't. I've always seen the Empire as our child, but I want something more than that with you, he said. It was becoming more and more clear that he wasn't a good communicator, but that didn't mean he wouldn't make an effort. That doesn't make them a prop, he said, finding that to be perhaps the most frustrating things she'd said. The two of them seemed unable to see the other's perspective.

But even through it all, he began to wonder if he could be a father as Kravos. He could never change the things he'd done, but he wasn't sure he would ever want his child to grow up like he was. He had done horrible things to set up the Empire, and now it would grow and expand with or without him. He wondered if the Empire didn't need him anymore, but he wasn't sure he could ever go back from what he was. What he had chosen to become. Maybe the Empire didn't need Kravos anymore, but he wasn't sure he even remembered what it meant to be Kal anymore.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste didn’t back down, and Lyanna began to cry just as he predicted. She saw Kravos hesitate with her, and she crossed her arms. She simply waited for him to do something about it. If he wanted to become a father, he had to let go of stupid illusions like whether or not a child was his. If he couldn’t get past that, she wouldn’t consider him as someone that could be a father. She kept her distance, now Elix watching with his eyes wide as his sister began to cry.

“Try now then,” Andraste gestured to Lyanna, the little baby squirming and wiggling in his arms. It was an amusing image, and she wasn’t used to seeing Kravos flustered like this. He could strike fear into anyone across the galaxy, and here he was completely out of his element with a tiny human that left him confused. Andraste watched for a moment, thinking about everything else he said.

“Give me time,” She finally muttered, “I’m still grieving. I am thinking about Cregan and I don’t want to make any brash decisions,” Andraste looked down at Elix, who was staring at Kravos with his wide, silver eyes, “But you have to understand that this isn’t a role you play off on your own island. Cregan saw Elix as his own son and Siris will learn to see Lyanna as his own. I want every child in this family to know about the support system they have. It goes so far beyond just you and me, Kal.”

Andraste stepped closer and smiled at him, raising a hand to cup the side of his face, “I love you and I want this with you. I just want you to be completely sure it’s what you want as well. In due time.”

 

[Darth Kravos]

Splendid... Kravos was left to try to placate the now-crying child, rocking and bouncing her as he stuck a finger out in an awkward and totally unsuccessful attempt to placate the baby. She grabbed it and promptly stuck it in her mouth, drooling and gumming it to which Kravos made a bit of a frowning, scowling face of cringe, but said nothing. On the bright side, now that she was gnawing on his finger, she wasn't crying anymore.

He nodded as she said that she needed time. Of course, she was right. This wasn't the best time to broach this conversation, but family wasn't his strong suit. He listened to what she said about not being an island, and he knew it was true, but it was also something he knew he struggled with. It frustrated him that it had taken him so long to meet the two of them, but now he had. He could make slow progress.

I know, he said. He had never really been a part of a family before, and most of those he cared about he either had killed or had been killed apart from Andraste. His heart beat a little faster as she touched the side of his face. No matter how long they'd been together, it still made him excited. It still made him feel that magnetism to her that was inescapable.

Okay, he said with a nod. I know I'm not experienced at this, but I want to be a part of your family, he said. He used the Force to pull her closer so that she could lean against him, still with his other finger in Lyanna's mouth. Tell me what to do to make it right, and I'll do it, he said. He wanted to mend the bridge that always seemed to be precarious between the two of them.

 

[Andraste]

Andraste couldn’t help but smile as Lyanna promptly used Kravos’ finger as a chew toy, happily munching away and having the time of her life. She was pacified immediately and Kravos simply put up with it. It was a tender moment, and she saw a side of him she had never seen before. Throughout their time of knowing one another, she had gotten to know many different sides and facets of him, and this was entirely new.

“She likes you,” Andraste spoke as she kept her gaze on Lyanna. After a moment, the baby stopped chewing and snuggled against Kravos’ chest and closed her eyes. Andraste focused back on him and leaned in to kiss him on the lips, eliciting another gagging noise from Elix. The little boy was obviously bored and wandered off around them to play. Andraste could sense him through the Force, allowing him to explore.

“Our family, Kal. It has always included you,” She pulled back from him, walking through the market, “There’s nothing to correct because you’re not doing anything wrong,” Andraste looked at him, “I want things to settle down more. I know you have plans for an attack on Ellora. Please be careful. I’m so afraid to lose you or Siris. I never expected to lose Cregan,” It was a reality that they were always in danger. Being a powerful family had its own dangers. That meant the dangers extended to the children as well.

“I’m afraid of what people might try to do to Elix or Lyanna…” Andraste watched Elix running around in the distance, “I don’t know what I’d do..” There was a flash in her eyes and she had to quell the rage that built up suddenly. Worlds would be destroyed if anything happened to her children.