For Love or Honor.

[Ralaa Talus]

Andara - Sunrise

The morning sun peeked over the horizon, shining upon the droplets of dew that blanketed the fields. It was the same as each morning before, and yet this one felt different. The heaviness that had burdened them in their grief had lifted and allowed her room to breathe. It was a much needed break from the trauma that had plagued her, though there were still doubts about where to go from here. There was still a bounty on her head, a problem that needed a quick resolution.

Ralaa sighed, eyes wandering to Silas who slept peacefully beside her. For a moment, she contemplated waking him, but for all of the nights that he hadn’t slept, it made sense to let him sleep. Soon the children would be running down to breakfast like a stampede of wild animals and if that didn’t wake him, he deserved to sleep.

Rolling over, she kissed him on the forehead, brushing stands of thick black hair from his face. “I love you,” she whispered, lingering a moment before climbing carefully out of bed to get dressed. Ralaa was quiet when she left, closing the door behind her.

In the kitchen, she packed a basket of fruits and foods for breakfast and made her way down to the creek where Silas had spent much of his time after Nans passing. It seemed only fair she startle him in her absence as he had tried to do to her. Besides, the hushed whisper of rushing water was far more peaceful than wrangling children for breakfast.

 

[Silas Rin]

Silas uncharacteristically slept through the entire night and into the morning. When he blinked his eyes open, the sunlight was pouring in through a window. He blinked his eyes, letting them adjust before rolling over, arm reaching over Ralaa's side of the bed. He buried his face in her pillow, letting the smell of her hair surround him.

He heard kids running through the halls below. He rolled back over and stared at the ceiling for a long moment before forcing himself to get up. He dressed and made his way downstairs, expecting to find Ralaa but she was nowhere to be found. He asked some of the women who had taken Nan's spot as cooks and general caretakers but none knew where she was, though one had seen earlier not too long ago leaving.

For the first time, he reached out with the Force, trying to sense her through the Force. After not sensing her nearby he bolted out the door. She wouldn't have left for Coruscant without him, would she? After last night? He didn't know. He checked the lading area and found his ship still there and all of the speeders still there as well.

He scratched his head before he finally sensed her. She was nearby, in the same spot they had fought yesterday. He felt like a different person than who he had been yesterday. He felt more like his old self, for now at least.

He made the short walk to the small clearing. He soon found her, sitting next to the creek next to a basket looking over the water. "Good Morning." he said quietly as he approached. He felt a pang of uncertainty. Maybe she had come out here to think alone, away from him. Maybe she had come out here to show him the fear she had felt. "Is it okay if I sit?" he said walking up beside her. If she wanted him to leave he would, but he found himself desperately wanting to be near her.

 

[Ralaa Talus]

Her bare feet rested in the water, toes buried in the muddied sand that rested on the rivers bed. Ralaa understood why Silas had favorited this spot, it was quiet here and easy to get lost in your own thoughts. The tall trees shaded her from the sun as it grew hotter and the cool stream that danced over the tops of her feet was calming. Her back rested against the base of a tree, head tilted back and eyes closed; it was hard not to hear Silas approaching. Ralaa knew he would find her here.

“You don’t need my permission to sit,” she chuckled, looking over to him with a soft smile. Her hand patted the grass beside her. “I didn’t want to wake you is all. You needed rest almost more than I did.”

She reached for the basket she had packed earlier that morning and placed it between them. A sort of truce, in case her running off had upset him. Ralaa only wanted to show him how she had felt and deter him from leaving without her again. They were a team; albeit an odd team, but a team none-the-less. They worked better together, even if the risk of losing one another was an unfathomable expense.

“I thought you might be hungry so I’ve packed you something. I wanted to avoid the chaos of breakfast; I hope you understand.” Ralaa smiled again, resting back against the base of the tree and digging her feet deeper into the river bed. Her hand reached to push a curl from her eyes.

 

[Silas Rin]

He returned the smile, albeit slightly more shyly. When she patted the ground he took his boots off and rolled his pant legs up and sat down. He slid his feet in the cool water of the creek. “I could probably have slept all day if you would have stayed in bed with me.” He admitted. It had been the best nights rest he had in a while.

She reached over and placed the food basket between them. Yesterday she had come to him with food as well, and he had rejected but today he found himself glad she had the foresight to bring food. His stomach was already growling audibly. “I definitely understand. This is nice. Thank you.” He said smiling.

He said leaning over the basket to look inside but not before stealing a kiss from Ralaa. His stomach growled again which elicited a small chuckle from Silas as he pulled back and look inside. He grabbed a container with cut up fruit and ate a piece. It was cool, the perfect complement to the morning that was already growing hot. He took another piece and offered it to Ralaa.

He knew they needed to make a plan, but he found himself holding on to the peaceful moment between them. He wasn't sure when they would get another chance at this.

He reclined back, putting his weight on his elbows before eating another piece of fruit. He sighed. Other than the looming shadow of the coming days, this was perfection. If he had a choice he would never leave this spot, never leave Ralaa.

“So I guess we should talk about what we are going to do next, huh?” He said reluctantly, not ready to move past this perfect moment.

 

[Ralaa Talus]

Love was not always easy, it too often brought difficult decisions and heartache. It could be rewarding too, even small rewards like being able to wake up each morning to the beautiful sun that filled Andaras skies and the sounds of children’s laughter as they ran up and down the halls. Ralaa had helped to give them this life, but how often had it brought her one step closer to the person she had sworn never to be?

Looking up at the blue skies she fell quiet for a moment, contemplating her words carefully. She knew what Silas wanted, but wasn’t sure it was worth the risk. It was not her place, even as a Jedi Master, to decide who was innocent and who was not. She had killed once for love, an idea that still haunted her dreams from time to time. Ralaa would do anything for him, but what would be the cost?

“Silas,” her eyes wandered over to him, “I would do anything for you, but I fear this isn’t just about removing the bounty on our heads. Revenge is a dark path and I’m not sure that I’m ready to lose you to that darkness.” Ralaa sighed, realizing the position she had put herself in, but finding no way out without losing Silas; she loved him too much to let him go, no matter the circumstance.

“I don’t have any ideas that don’t put innocent lives in danger. Hurting them wouldn’t bring back Nan and I’m afraid even if we tried, I might lose the man I’ve come to love so deeply.”

Reaching over, she rested her hand on his and offered him a kind smile. “I’m not saying that we should do nothing, only that we need to consider our options carefully.”

 

[Silas Rin]

He could tell she was torn. There would be a time in the very near future where she would have to choose between her life and her life as a Jedi. It hung over them like a cloud the wouldn't go away and it threatened to tear her apart. It was painful to watch as Silas knew it wasn't his place to weigh in on the topic. It was her choice and one that wouldn't wait much longer.

She spoke as if he was about on the verge of becoming some evil villain. It confused and hurt him a little. Sure, he had a bad week and he could have handled things better but he was here now. "I am not going anywhere." he said trying to reassure her. "I am not sure why you think you are about to lose me. What have I done to give you this fear?" he asked. He didn't want to press the issue, but maybe now was the time. They would need to make hard choices in the days ahead and this couldn't hang over them while they did it.

"Not doing anything puts innocent lives at risk. The next bounty hunter may come with more and they may not think before they attack the children here." he said seriously. "I won't allow that to happen." he said feeling her hand on his. "I won't." he repeated more to convince himself than anything.

"I am open to ideas, and I take no joy at the thought of violence. I came here to be away from violence, but if there isn't another choice, I will tear that gang apart piece by piece if it means these kids will be safe." he said with conviction. Was he afraid she may decide to go back to the Jedi? Yes. He was terrified but these kids trusted him, trusted her to do what was best for them and he had every intention to do whatever it took, pay whatever price to make sure that happened.

 

[Ralaa Talus]

Her heart sank into the empty pit of her stomach, pulling her hand back into her lap. However dark, Silas was correct that no matter their decision, someone’s life was at risk and there was no way around it. Andara was supposed to be their safe haven, but Makos bounty was threatening that safety; they couldn’t sit around and hope that it’s go away, it didn’t work that way. Ralaa knew better than that.

“No, you’re right.” She admitted, eyes focused on the steady stream that rolled over the tops of her feet. “Our inaction isn’t going to do us any favors. One way or another, Mako will find a way to rip us apart even from the grave. He seems to have a talent for that.”

Ralaa ran a hand through her thick curls and sighed in frustration. For the first time in a long time, she didn’t have any ideas. Considering Mako was already dead, there wasn’t much they could do about the source of the bounty; it wasn’t likely the men he had left behind had any control over his funds or knew where they were being held.

To eradicate the galaxy of every bounty hunter was completely irrational and would take far too much time. Besides, it would more than likely result in a subsequent bounty placed on their heads by the Hutt Cartel, an organization she was happy to have avoided thus far.

“I don’t have any ideas, Silas. Not any wise ideas, at least. Nothing that isn’t going to get us killed.” She frowned, head sore as she racked her brain for the right words or an answer to their problems.

 

[Silas Rin]

Silas sighed. He wished he knew a way to ease the struggle inside of her but there were no easy answers, no simple solutions. The only thing he was certain of anymore is they needed to settle this once and for all with this gang, or it would always come back to haunt them.

He thought for a moment, making sure he saw no other way. "I will contact Francis and have him double the security here. You and I will go to Coruscant and do whatever we have to do to keep our children safe." he said "They attacked us on Coruscant and we tried running and the non-violent approach but we can't keep running. This is our home and I won't let some dead thug and his lackeys take that from us." he said

"We will do it together." he said nodding as he looked forward. He was aware of the struggle she faced, being torn between the life of the Jedi and her life here. Maybe this would convince her to leave him. He knew that was a possibility, but it had to be done. She wouldn't let him go alone so he had to push forward with her and hope she saw the good in what they were doing. No harm would come to an innocent. These were killers and if they all ended up dead at the end of this, the Galaxy would be a better place for it.

"So?" he asked.

 

[Ralaa Talus]

It was pointless to argue, no matter if she agreed with him or not. For too long the two of them had sat idle, hoping to find a peaceful resolution to a problem that had none. It was foolish to hope that it would resolve on its own and to let Silas leave without her was not an option just as he'd never agree to let her go on her own. The last time they had separated themselves to face this threat, Silas had near lost his life in the fires that claimed the orphanage; Ralaa would not let him suffer the same fate again, regardless of the fact that this put her in an even darker position within the Jedi Order. It seemed she'd do just about anything for the sake of love, an idea she hoped she'd never come to regret.

"I don't believe we have a choice." She sighed, picking herself up off of the ground and dusting the dirt from her clothes. Her eyes met with Silas, a heaviness in her tone. "I will go and pack our things and prepare transport to Coruscant. Tell Francis we leave as soon as his troops are here." Ralaa sighed, brushing the curls from her face as she turned to walk the path back towards their establishment. It wouldn't take them long to reach Coruscant and the sooner they arrived, the sooner it would be over and they could return home.

Her eyes focused on her feet as she walked, refusing to look behind her to Silas for fear she'd say something stupid or change her mind about leaving. There was something that plagued her about returning to Mako's establishment, to the scene where she had killed him and executed an unarmed, unconscious guard. It hadn't been one of her proudest moments and it was a memory she had hoped to have forgotten. She could still picture the pits, the blurred images of grenades being tossed into the open windows of Silas' orphanage and the taste of the gas that had filled the room before her escape.

 

[Silas Rin]

For a moment he thought she would speak up, he was desperate for it but instead, she reluctantly agreed and left him sitting alone. He let out a sigh as she walked away.

They were being crushed under this weight. Perhaps if Silas was stronger or wiser they wouldn't be in this mess. He felt like she was slipping away from him, the thought terrified him. He stood and quickly caught up to her, her gaze transfixed on the ground as she walked. He grabbed for her hand and spun her. He reached under the curly hair and gently held the side of her face in one hand. "We will make it through this." he said quietly "just like we always have." he said leaning down to lightly kiss her forehead.

They returned back home and began preparations which came together quickly and soon the ship was running through its last pre-flight checks. "You ready?" he asked Ralaa before he fired the ship's engines and they left Andara and set course for Coruscant to have to their final showdown with Mako's gang.

While he knew this mission would be dangerous, he felt more at peace than he had in some time. He wasn't sure what had brought him so low, but he felt like he was waking up from a long, restless night. He had made mistakes, jeopardized everything. He had been a fool and if continued, he would lose everything. He knew what he needed to know, it all started with a hard conversation. He reached for Ralaa's hand, eyes fixed forward staring at the blurring lines of hyperspace.

"There is something I need to tell you..." he said quietly.

Maybe she would leave him. He wasn't sure he deserved anything less but he was certain she deserved to know.

 

[Ralaa Talus]

The afternoon passed, the warm Andara sun dipping below the horizon as night stars began to take its place. Through the window of their ship, Ralaa watched the arm guards stationed around the orphanage and took in a deep and disappointed breath. They had come to seek peace, but peace didn't look like this. This looked more like preparations for war and it was disheartening, but at least she knew the children were safe and she remained hopeful that their mission to Coruscant wouldn't keep them absent for long. Their place was here, not chasing criminals on forsaken worlds.

Ralaa sat in silence, wondering again if this was the right decision. It wasn't her place, as a Master or otherwise, to pass judgment and certainly not to swing the sword, but the consequences of inaction would be detrimental. For the first time in a while, she found herself missing the wisdom of her peers and questioning her place. Her home was here and her love for Silas was unconditional but in order to survive here, she was abandoning a piece of who she was. There was never a question of her responsibilities as a Jedi Master, but where did she draw the line in her role now? Silas and his children depended on her, but when it came to their protection, where did she draw the line? That was a question she didn't have the answer to, though she had tried to answer it on many occasions.

"I'm sure that whatever it is, it will still be relevant when we are finished." Her attention moved to Silas, realizing now that they had already departed the atmosphere. Ralaa had been so deep in her own thoughts that she hadn't realized and the blurred lines of hyperspace captured her eyes for a brief moment before she looked at him. "Of course, unless it needs to be discussed in this precise moment. I'd much rather hear about Loa's training. How is she doing?" A smile graced her lips and she squeezed his hand, leaning back in her chair.

 

[Silas Rin]

He let out a quiet sigh as she stopped him before he said anything else. "I can wait." he finally said letting the subject be changed to his apprentice, Loa.

"She can be...stubborn." he said. He had experience dealing with teenagers and their grand ability to think they knew how everything in the galaxy worked but she took it to the next level. "This is only amplified by her raw talent in the Force. She is strong and learns quickly, but I worry for her." he admitted. There was something to be said about struggling to get better. Loa was not patient enough to let things develop naturally. She needed progress now and would push back against any attempts at Silas cautioning her. "and she does have a good heart, even if she uses those good intentions to make wrong choices."

"Perhaps I made a mistake in teaching her." he finally said. This spoke more about his doubt in himself than any doubt he had in Loa. If he was wiser, perhaps he would know how to better deal with a stubborn apprentice. The Jedi Masters he had trained with as a boy always seemed like they had the answers, but Silas felt like he was in the dark. "Maybe if I was wiser..."

The conversation dwindled there into small talk for a time before Ralaa drifted to sleep, leaving Silas alone to his thoughts as they flew towards Coruscant. He had to believe they were almost out of this. They had come so far, accomplished so much. They were at the finish line of building a better life for their children.

He sighed again, letting his focus fade as he starred out into the blur of hyperspace.