Don't Shake Babies

[Robert Abbotangelo]

Now, Bob was having a bit of a rough day. He had been recalled to Ossus, which was already a planet he held no particular love for. The biggest contributor to his ire, was the fact that Imperial Intelligence, his bosses, were headquartered on the planet. He didn't have much against the planet itself, but he could do without all the secrecy and spy stuff. Ironic, considering Bob was a pretty secretive spy who was good at both those things.

Even worse, when he got off work after several hours of meandering uselessness, Bob was mugged. Well, not really. Bob was the victim of an attempted mugging, problem was, the thug didn't really take into account the fact, that Bob was almost supernaturally healthy for his age and size. So when Bob swiftly turned on his heel and pelted it back down the street, the man was a little befuddled.

Unfortunately for Bob, this mugging just got worse. Just as he turned a corner he was once again, accosted by the local thuggery. A different gang it seemed from the man who had previously attempted to mug him. Speaking of which, the pitter pattering of several feet made themselves known as the previous man, plus two extra of his goons, rounded the corner and immediately squared off with the other gang.

"This be our mark!" One of the thugs called out in broken basic, obviously his mum never taught him that well.

"Well he's on our territory now!" Another called out, this time from the new gang.

"I'm standing right here!" Bob yelled back, unhappy that they were talking about him like he was an object. A rather unwise move all things considered. The thuggery turned back to Bob, and collectively decided via some strange gang member hive mind, to surround him. Before they could complete that though, Bob spotted a younger woman who sported all the telltale signs of being one of them Sith like folk. "Hey! Could I request, from one Imperial servant to another, some assistance?!" Bob cried out dramatically, though he was just putting on a show of being a helpless old man.

@Raven_41

 

[Irolia Shen]

Now, Irolia haven't had a very great day to start off with. A most annoying nightmare had kept her up most of the night. To make matters worse, she hit her forehead when she got up from the bed, cursing and swearing throughout the interior of her ship. Just to really piss her off, some asshole stole one of her blasters when she walked around the streets. To put it simply, she was not very agreeable with anyone today. "Stupid... fucking day... getting one of my two favorite blasters stolen.. Who the hell do they think they are?!" Cursed the young blue sith, walking further down a street, with her 'parrot' sitting on her shoulder responding to its owner's frustration.

As she passed by a side street, hearing a voice calling. She turned her attention down the street the voice came from. An older man, surrounded by a group of what most likely looked like a gang. Probably a local one at that didn't look very pirate-like. And that's when she saw it... her gun?! The asshole who stole her damn gun was one of them! Oh, she was going to enjoy this!

Walking directly towards the part of the group, who still had their back turned to her. "Hey, you! Yea you! You stole my fucking blaster!" She cried out furious. Probably not fair to place all her today's unluckiness, but she didn't care. Charging dead-on at the gang, screaming as she ignited her lightsaber. The gang was caught by surprise. They hadn't expected a girl charging them the way Irolia did.

Oozed with anger, her piercing red eyes locked with the first one in her way. Like cutting through butter, the blade decapitated the man on the spot. The three thugs who followed Bob seem to know what a red coloured blade represented 'cause they ran, as in, as fast as their legs could move them. Another thug got his chest penetrated and died instantly.

The one, who had stolen her gun, started to run for his life, got thrown violently into the street wall, knocked unconscious. Irolia tried to get to the unconscious thug to get her gun but the rest of the second gang, who didn't run, started to shoot at her. She snarled pissed off while blocking several blaster bolts. One of the bolts got through her defends and scraped her thigh, making her hiss in pain. Only one thug, a Gran, seemed to turn his gun at Bob, to make sure he wouldn't run. The rest kept firing at the blue newcomer, turning their back to Bob.

@Shax

 

[Robert Abbotangelo]

The Sith, as you do, charged in. Angrily snarling the whole way towards the stunned group as she immediately started hacking and slashing her way through the assorted thuggery. It would have been quite impressive really, had it not been so totally unnecessary and a huge overreaction.

Bob was just as shocked as the rest of the thugs as heads started rolling, only jumping into action once the mooks started shooting in the general direction of the Sith. Though, to say they were shooting at her was a bit of an overstatement. They were wildly shooting at her with the kind of inaccuracy and blatant ineptitude one would expect from those racially derogatory stereotypes that you find in old fantasy movies who seemed fascinated with the idea of deserts, gunpowder guns, duels, and sand.

After blinking away his stupor Bob went into tactical cool guy mode. Immediately he crunched his fist right into the nose of the Gran who was pointing a gun at him. Bob pulled out his knife and jabbed it down into the soft fleshy bits around his belly. He wouldn't die if he got medical attention, but who knew what would happen.

He grabbed the fallen grans gun and started blamming it at towards the remaining thuggery, not looking to kill, just to scare them away. They scattered, some booking it down the street, not payed enough to fight against a crazy old man with a knife and a thrice damned Sith.

The telltale *WeeWoo WeeWoo* of sirens began crying out, but Bob just ignored them in favor of lumbering his copious mass towards the Sith. "Thank you my girl! You've saved me having to rough up those ruffians! How's about I buy you a drink to say thank you!"

@Raven_41

 

[Irolia Shen]

Irolia might have overreacted a bit, as she went batshit-slice'n'dice-crazy on the scared and frantic thugs on the street. But then again, one of them took her damn gun and no one steals her stuff without paying the price. With her still ignited lightsaber in one hand she slightly hobbled over to the unconscious thug, who had stolen her gun. She stopped by the thug who still had her gun and looked down at the knocked out man. Her red eyes flared with hate at the thug kneeling down, completely ignoring the older man, thanking her. She turned off her lightsaber and hooked it to her belt as a crackling sound sizzled from her hand. A deep electric taste filled the air as the blue-skinned sith shot lighting directly at the man's face. The electric taste quickly got mixed with a sort of rotten flesh taste, as Irolia grilled the screaming man painfully. Although her lightning was no way near powerful enough to kill, it was still highly effective at torturing and especially when it was this close.

The man squealed and twisted in pain as lightning torched his face. As she only was able to shoot a small burst of lightning, the torture was over within 30 seconds or less. Taking her gun back from the man, she shot him in the head and holstered it, like it was nothing. Finally, she turned around, facing the older man, "I don't really drink..." she replied, hearing the sirens for the first time now. To be fair, Irolia has never actually tried alcohol before and never saw a reason to drink it. Her small droid flew down to her as she, beeping happily to her, "there you were Parrot!" she said with a small smile. Caressing the dome of her droid, she was turned her attention to the older man again and was about to actually change her answer and accept the man's offer. Unfortunate a loud command interrupted her.

The local police in the city had pulled up only a few meters from Bob and Irolia when she shot the man. Looking over the scene, they just saw gang violence and Irolia and Bob as surviving thugs. By pulling their guns, the first officer yelled "STOP! You are under arrest!" while pointing his blaster at Bob and Irolia. Now, Irolia was not having it today and very small things as this would be able to piss her off. Clicking her lightsaber from her belt, she was about to slaughter these too fools

@Shax

 

[Robert Abbotangelo]

Bob laughed as the girl said she didn't really drink. He was sure he could get her to start however, he just had that kind of effect on women. His good cheer halted slightly when the hot fuzz showed up however, but he still had the presence of mind to raise his hands. "I understand officer, however I am an officer of Imperial Intelligence, and my companion here is a Sith. We were accosted by the local thuggery, and were forced to defend ourselves. I'm going to reach into my pocket and retrieve my-" Bob stopped as he was cutoff by the Cop, who had paled and lowered his blaster. "I'm so sorry my lords! Please forgive me!" He unfortunately didn't give them a chance to forgive him, as he ducked back into his speeder and blasted off into the beyond realm.

Bob just shrugged and lowered his hands, turned to Irolia, and said with a happy voice, "I'm buying! And besides! Its always a good idea to celebrate your continued life at the expense of other people! Really puts everything in perspective." Bob laughed. He noticed the droid, and while he had never been entranced by the mechanical creatures, he did have an inkling of courtesy. "And who is this little friend?" He said, in reference to 'parrot.'

@Raven_41

 

[Irolia Shen]

Irolia almost a bit disappointed, that she wouldn't get to teach the officer a lesson. The cheerful man make Irolia raised an eyebrow. he was way too happy and cheerful for someone who just witnesses killing and still act so carefree. "Not promising anything old timer" she answered, though a small smile crept forward, which she tried to oppress. Come on, who wouldn't smile? It was really hard not to! Parrot leaned to the side, like a dog, looking curiously at something. "Parrot? His my bibliomech droid, though I've changed quite a bit of him" the blue Sith explained, caressing the droid's rounded dome. Parrot crawled like a spider across Irolia's shoulders to the other side to get closer to Bob. "He's quite the scaredy-cat when danger arrives, but I love him to bits. He does come when it's serious, to my aid though" Irolia, explained following Parrot with her eyes. The little droid, not much bigger than 20 to 30 centimetre in it's crawling phase, crawled all over Irolia, like a spider.

"He goes, where ever I go. Which is the way I like it" the blue Sith finished and looked back at Bob. "Well lead the way old timer, you're the expect" she finally said and followed Bob to where-ever bar or waterhole he took them to. If Irolia had to be honest, which was a bit of a rarity with Sith, sometimes, she has never actually tried alcohol before. Though that was not something she felt like blabbering out about. The blue-skinned Sith was still not sure if she actually liked this old man, or if she just tolerated him. Her innocent and good-hearted core, the protected side of her mind, loved Bob, her Sith side, not quite sure.

@Shax

 

[Robert Abbotangelo]

Bob nodded politely as Irolia explained her little droid, happy that even Sith could find non-destructive companionship with things. It wasn't often Bob was able to see the things that made Sith happy, so this was a particular treat. With a good natured cackle, Bob gestured for Irolia to follow him into the city.

There were definite benefits to being an Imperial Overseer. Beyond of course the instant respect and status one received when flashing their credentials. No, most often the greatest benefits come in the form of careful planning and many many years of information gathering. So it was Bob's professional opinion, a theory tested by countless other Imperial Agents who had gathered what amounted to decades of experience on the subject, that this particular cantina was the best one on Ossus.

'Nothing Suspicious Here' was a high end bar just six blocks away from the Imperial Intelligence HQ. T'was run by a retired agent, and a man Bob knew very well from his younger years. Yep, it was the legendary 'Long Johns' Jackson. A decorated field agent and Bobby A's personal friend. Normally it would take several weeks of waiting in order to get a table reserved, but with Bob's winning smile and the casual name dropping of the legendary Long Johns himself, not to mention that he was a regular at the establishment, allowed them quick access.

He guided the girl through the crowd and found themselves a table. "Well my girl, welcome to the best watering hole on Ossus! Now you didn't hear it from me," Bob leaned in conspiratorially. "But legend has it, that the rifle hanging over the bar? It was used to assassinate prospective Mandalore's before they gained enough power. Yep, only reason the Mandalorians are a problem these days is because ol' Long Johns is too old to be workin' the regular mission." Bob said with a grin, meanwhile signalling for a few drinks to be brought over.

@Raven_41

 

[Irolia Shen]

Irolia followed the funny old man away from the area and into a much more crowded area. The place seemed highly sought after, as the line to get it, seemed neverending. But, what luck, they got in just by saying a name and a smile from her new friendly old man... Then again, he did seem to be someone who came often, because of how the bouncer just let him in without any tension. "Remind me to take you with me, next time I'm going into an old Sith Temple" joked the blue alien with a humous smile.

Following the larger man deeper into the bar, they quickly found a table to sit by. So far it was alright, nothing too over-the-top. She hasn't exactly tried alcohol, so she would have to wait to see what all the fuss about alcohol was. A waiter greeted Bob as if they were old friends, "Bob! How great to see you again, haven't seen you in a while! How's the family?" Asked the waiter, referring to Bob's squad of men. "These are on the house" leaning closely to Robert "the big man's order" whispered the waiter to Bob, just enough, so Irolia wouldn't hear it, as the waiter hinted that bob had gotten extremely lucky with his date.

Irolia was non-the-wiser as she looked around in awe over the settings of the bar. She had a rather adorable look to her face. She looked back at the drinks on the table in front of them both. The drinks in all manner of colours, a few of them even changed colour, depending on how you looked at it. Irolia was actually a bit surprised at how many drinks were placed at their table. The blue alien looked at Bob, "is it normal to get so many drinks?" Asked she rather curious, showing how little she knew of drinking alcohol.

@Shax

 

[Robert Abbotangelo]

Bob laughed with the waiter, "Large and ever expanding my friend! And thank you." He said, not acknowledging his comment about the Sith girl. He didn't think of her like that, hell he had given up thinking of anyone like that. He had spent enough time 'getting around' so to speak in his younger years, now he just had that deep seated need to make sure everyone he saw succeeded.

"No my girl, usually you pick one drink you like and enjoy that for the rest of the night. However, since you seem to be a little inexperienced, I figured we could just try em' all!" Bob laughed again. He hadn't tried any of the new stock that had come in recently, so he was also sampling for himself as well.

@Raven_41

 

[Irolia Shen]

The waiter walked away, as he actually still was working and had no time for lollygagging. Irolia took one of the drinks and sniffed it, it smelled weird. She gave Bob a glance, "and you're sure people just drink this?". Never-the-less, she looked back at the glass in her hand. She looked around and saw some other Imperial officers, most likely on shore leave. It almost impressed Irolia at how fast and much they were drinking the alcohol before them. Not that she was just throwing it all into her mouth, like the Imperials. The moment Irolia sipped to her drink, her face twisted in disgust, "Ew ew ew, yuck! That's foul..." said the blue Sith and placed the drink on the table.

"How do you like stuff like that?!" Asked Irolia Bob, still with a face twisted in disgust. It had such a strong burning taste, she couldn't even describe it, that's how bad it tasted to her. "I think I'll pass on drinks in like... forever" commented the blue alien, "but be my guess to drink the rest" added Irolia motioning with her hand as she leaned back in her seat.

@Shax