Another Log on the Fire

[SoloWing]

"Alright, girl." Nuala took a deep breath. "You can do this. Just keep your calm and it'll all be good."

Arranging this meeting had taken a lot of begging, pleading and a lot of bull-headed stubbornness. It was to her credit then that stubbornness was her stock in trade. Master Bektar Vor Tulon had finally agreed to meet with her.

After all that had had gone on and after all of the controversy surrounding Cath, Nuala had found herself needed to talk the situation out with someone. The person who was in the thick of trying to help Cath seemed like the best possible candidate. All she had to do was march through those doors and talk to him.

So she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and tried to center herself. Once Nuala was sure that she was calm and collected, her eyes opened. She moved forward, opened the doorway, and stepped through.

"Master Vor Tulon--" Her greeting came to an abrupt halt, as did her footsteps, as the first sight of the Jedi Master greeted her.

Nuala had seen a lot in her life. This was the first time that she had ever been intimidated so easily. It didn't have anything to do with force powers or the like. Bektar Vor Tulon had a presence that was just that... powerful.

She tried to cover her surprise by giving him the proper bow. "-- it is an honor to meet with you."

 

[Matt]

Bektar smiled and bowed back at the young padawan, it felt like such a short time ago that he was on the cusp of being a Jedi Knight himself, in awe of those who had already achieved such a goal.

''A pleasure to meet you, my young friend''

Bektar indicated the two comfortable chairs by the window as he took a seat, he wrapped his robes around himself before fixing his large yellow eyes on the padawan before him.

''I apologise that I have not been able to see you sooner but I have been to busy with tasks regarding the council and the recent bombing. You now fully have my attention Nuala, how can I help you?''

 

[SoloWing]

Well, he was certainly a whole lot nicer than his appearance would indicate. Nuala nodded respectfully in response to his words and then followed him over to the chairs. She took the one that was indicated and sat on it. All the while she was calming her breathing and building up the steel of her spine. This was a tricky line to walk, but, she was going to walk it.

"It's alright. I understand how crazy things could get." Maybe not exactly, but it seemed the proper thing to say; she could imagine how busy it would be trying to ride herd on security and mourning. "I appreciate you seeing me, however. That does mean a lot to me."

She took another breath and then continued: "It's... well, I'll just come right out and say it if that's alright with you... It's about the big controversy over Master Cathbodua. Some of the things going on there have me concerned-- not just about the training, there's a couple of other things outside that as well-- and I needed to talk to someone about them. To get some advice about how to deal with all of it.

"All things considered, uh..." She hesitated for a moment to think of the right way to phrase this. Diplomacy had never been her strong point. "... it seemed right to come to you about it."

 

[Matt]

''Yes, there has been some interest from the council regarding this subject, it is a delicate matter but I fear it originally comes from the council failing one of our students. We cannot use the excuse of such trying times to negate on one of our most important goals...the training of young Jedi''

Bektar looked out through the window at the planet below, seeing the strict defensive measures he himself had brought about at the temple's filled him with regret, he thought he a horrible sight that a place of learning was now more akin to a military facility.

''Well, keep speaking young one and I shall listen''

 

[SoloWing]

Well, he'd told her to. Nuala continued: "I'm not here to complain about her training or give an opinion on it. I'm not qualified to get into that discussion. But, well, I guess at the same time that I am. Y'see... given what's happened... I can't help but feel that Master Cathbodua's training policies are a symptom of the problem, rather than an actual problem.

"I probably better explain that. A while back..." Nerfhide, there was no right way to say this. "... Cath wanted to show me how to use the force to neutralize poisons. The problem was that to do it she laced a drink with hallucinogens without my knowledge. Once I'd taken some and started down the hyperspace routes to swirlsville, she tried to talk me through the procedure.

"I'm sure that you've noticed, but I'm a bit, uh, shorter than most. Maybe that threw off the calculations of the dose or something but between the trip and the cryptic instructions, I couldn't get a hold of myself to do the technique right.

"Anyway, after I stopped drooling like a maniac and came back to the land of the fully mobile, I was... less than Jedi-like, let's put it that way, so I took it out on her.

"At first, Cath just stuck to her standard 'this-is-appropriate-training-other-ways-don't-get-results' line, which I am abominably tired of hearing. I explained that I wasn't upset at the training, but the abuse of trust. I trusted her and she turned that trust back on me. That's when things took a turn for the weirdport. It was... almost like Cath had never considered the fact that her students trusted her before, because it knocked her straight out of the broken holorecording training line.

"She just... seemed unable to comprehend that. Everything she said kept going back to the training line. But I kept at it. Y'see... I've suspected all along that Cath's missing a few spaceports upstairs if you get my drift, and the fact that she couldn't comprehend trust just sort of confirmed that."

Nuala found herself starting to relax a bit now that the worst of it was over. She pressed on. "We talked a bit more and she gave me more of her sob story and said that training was all that she had and that was the only terms that she ever thought in was about training and the like. She doesn't seem to have much of a life outside of the training circle, which, to tell you the truth, would drive me batty as well.

"So, uh, somehow she agreed to let me teach her how to loosen up, have fun and get away from the training rooms once in a while... we went out into the woods after that and just chilled for a while then came back to the temple... and that's pretty much where I'm at right now. It's... more than a bit bizarre."

That didn't even cover it. If anyone had ever told Nuala that during the course of her life she'd end up playing battle ball with a chick in a rubber suit and a whip, then Nuala would have called that person crazy. But she had and probably would end up doing it again. Since when had her life gotten so messed up?

 

[Matt]

''What is your opinion on your Master? What do you feel she is like as a person,a jedi?''

Bektar was almost becoming famous as a Jedi who rarely talked but coming for a species famed for it's hunting techniques and warrior culture he generally kept the first thing that popped into his head to himself rather then become a source of terror, and become something that was not proper when talking about a Jedi Master.

He was however a good listener, and this young Jedi clearly had a great many things she needed to get off his chest.

 

[SoloWing]

Nuala considered that for a moment before replying. What did she think of Cath? That was a sticky subject in and of itself. Trying to discuss that while being truthful and diplomatic at the same time was... difficult. If this was what politicians did all the time, then Nuala could understand why no one trusted them.

"As a person, I think she's slightly messed up upstairs. Pretty much everything that she ever says when challenged or asked for an explanation is some variation of 'my-way-gets-results-and-will-make-you-strong'. That level of obsession can't be good for a person. She just... really seems dead inside at times, like the actions are there but there's nothing behind it. But, at the same time, I have gotten her to loosen up once... so there is that.

"As a Jedi... I dunno. I'm a greenhorn at this Jedi stuff. But she seems a little cutthroat. I'm not exactly a saint and I've never claimed to be one-- my file will tell you that. I don't think she's ever acting out of malice or anger, but results seem to matter just a bit too much to her. She seemed inclined to take a prisoner as a human shield once on Tatooine and... that doesn't sit right with my gut.

"Her training methods make you learn and learn fast assuming that you're alright with super-harsh strictness and having all sense of personality ground out of you. I've seen what this type of stuff does to a person long term and I don't like it. But... I dunno if that's what you guys want or not."

Man, this conversation was turning out to be really lopsided. Nuala should have expected it to a degree, since she was the one who had come to air out her mind. But still... this was turning into a long monologue with a polite response once in a while.

"Here's the thing, though." She continued. "Despite all of that, I think that there's potential for her to grow out of this obsession and into a decent person. She really doesn't have much of an actual life when you get down to it and that might be the core problem of it all. I want to help her out with this, show her that there's more to life than just drilling the force into people's heads... I'm just not sure how... or if I'm doing it in the right way."

There. She'd said it. Nuala let silence take over as she finished. Now that the worst of her explanation was over, it should be all downhill from here. Right?