Ask Coruscant Payback

[Talak Rand]

Talak was... mildly peeved at how she was acting. They had been through so much together and now she was just going to wash her hands of everything?

No, he said bluntly and shook his head. He could see that the smile she had was an empty one, and if she thought that he was just going to let her walk out of here like that then she had another thing coming.

After everything we've been through you're just gonna walk out? he asked incredulously. He was clearly a bit annoyed that that was how she wanted to play that.

I don't care if we've only known each other a few days, we've been through more in those days than most people go through in months... years! he objected.

And you're not any more interested in "parting ways"... he actually threw up little finger quotes around his head ...and pretending this never happened than I am, he said with a frown. This was almost the most animated she would have ever seen him, and it was brought on by him vehemently objecting to... this whole situation.

 

[Trys Aran]

Trys was taken aback by his flat rejection of her words. Her face betrayed as much, her eyes widening in surprise. Where was this coming from? He had always been closed off and curt, and she expected him to sit there silently as she left. Trys was entirely prepared for that after how he had been before. She had already been thinking about how she had to drop off the rental speeder, and all of that came abruptly crashing down.

Trys didn’t sit down, but she was rooted in place. She could vaguely make out Artee beginning to come in, analyze the situation and promptly step back once more looking as concerned as a droid could manage. Trys stared at Talak blankly for a few moments, anger simmering beneath the surface though none of it showed externally.

“What the hell do you want from me?” She finally snapped back at him, her neutral expression turning into a scowl, “You want me to grovel at your feet and tell you how you great you are just like Fancy and the others? You want me to tell you you’re my hero? Because that’s not gonna happen.”

Trys shook her head, “I already thanked you for helping me, but clearly that’s not good enough,” Her voice was raising then and she stepped closer to him, the anger now breaking through her normally cool resolve, “So I ask again, what do you want from me? Why are you so damn kriffing concerned about what I think?”

 

[Talak Rand]

As she talked about groveling at his feet, his face turned into an expression that could only be interpreted as "what the kriff are you talking about?" She was angry. He was angry. Was this cathartic? Either that or extremely destructive. He was upset, but he made an intentional effort to withhold that anger. He already knew what she thought of him when he grew angry, and the last thing he wanted was for her to actually be afraid of him.

When did I ever ask for that! he said, almost shouting, before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath in. He looked up at her, scowling.

You've evidently made all these preconceived notions about me, but if you're going to judge me then judge me on what I actually do not on your imagination of what I want from you, he said. He hadn't asked by be held up by Fancy and the others, and he hadn't even asked for Trys's thanks. He probably owed her more than she owed him anyway, and he would have said as much were he not fairly certain that as soon as he did, she would lock in on that and try to write this entire conversation off as his guilt talking... which it wasn't.

How could he tell her what he actually wanted? It sounded so stupid. No, it was so stupid. Friendship with a "normal" person wasn't in the cards for him. Apparently it never had been, but he was stubborn, and he refused to believe it until life beat it into him.

The silence lingered for a moment, and he realized if he didn't say something she was liable to just walk out the door. Kark, he thought.

I don't want anything from you, he said. They were words... that was a step in the right direction even if they weren't that helpful of words.

I thought... that you and I had... I don't know... something in common. Maybe not quite kindred spirits, but something more than just parting ways and never seeing each other again, he said. Had that made any sense? There was a distinct possibility that it hadn't, but the tone wasn't quite as harsh as his last had been.

 

[Trys Aran]

Trys simply stared at him through his little tirade. Truthfully, this was all shocking. She wasn’t often put in a position where she felt out of her element and caught off guard. Trys didn’t interrupt him as always, letting him get it all out as she silently took it all in. Her body language didn’t signal that she was about to bolt regardless of what he said or didn’t.

By the time she was done, there was nothing but silence hanging between them. She ran her fingers through her hair, looking away for a moment. If he looked, he would be shocked to find the faintest tug of a smile threatening to grace her face. However, she kept it from actually showing up, and she looked at him with a more serious face.

“You do want something from me,” She said quietly at last, gazing directly into his eyes, “Something you shouldn’t want. Something I don’t think I can give you,” Trys wouldn’t elaborate beyond that unless he kept pressing her. She inhaled and exhaled slowly, “Our paths lead different ways. I stay on the side of the law, and you follow it when you please and other times...you decide it doesn’t apply to you.”

She thought about how he simply killed on a whim and left dead bodies behind, “I will never be all right with the way you handle things. And you will never be all right constantly trying to suppress who you are. That’s not fair to either of us. I can only hope…” Trys looked down, “...That our paths don’t cross where we are on opposite sides.”

 

[Talak Rand]

Talak really didn't think it would be helpful to point out that he really never thought that the law applied to him. It would have really been pretty much the opposite of helpful to his case that he was trying to make.

She stared straight into his eyes and he looked into hers as well. She wasn't... leaving, but he didn't really know how to interpret that. Did she want to stay? Was it a courtesy? Did she pity him? His fingers tapped against the sofa.

And what is it I want from you? he asked. She may have been right in what she thought, but the way Talak saw it, she had a lot of thoughts about him, and only some of them were true... or were more of them true? He was prepared to do terrible things for the cause, so maybe that really did make him a monster.

 

[Trys Aran]

Trys was hoping he would focus on the rest of what she said, but unfortunately he latched onto only one component of it. There was silence again after he asked his question, and she simply sighed, staring up at the ceiling. Did she want to entertain this? Wouldn’t it be easier to simply say forget it and walk out?

In the end, she walked over and plopped back down where she had been sitting. She even reached over and took her wine back, taking a long gulp before she pondered on her words. Trys swirled the drink around in her hand, staring off for a long moment before she finally turned to look at him again.

“Me,” She said at last, “Whether as a friend or…” She shrugged, “Something more. But it’s me,” Trys wouldn’t continue if he chose to butt in or intervene, and he would know better than to do that. He knew her style enough to know she wasn’t the type to press or push anything, “Because I cut through the structural deficiencies in your walls like a saber,” Trys couldn’t help but smile faintly at that, recalling the Zilkin’s words.

“But it’s misplaced,” Trys sighed, looking down at the wine again, “You’re alone and guarded and wanting to reach out to the first thing that shows you a way out,” She stared at him again, really looking into his eyes, “Do you want it all to be at the cost of who you fundamentally are?”

 

[Talak Rand]

Did she think he was hitting on her? Was he hitting on her? Those weren't the questions he was here to ask. None of these were the questions he was here to ask. He always found a reason to push off these questions to another time. There was always a mission or a job or a threat that demanded he not think about it. Now, he was searching for an excuse but coming up short.

The reality, though, was that she was right. He wanted someone who made him feel normal, but he wasn't normal. He never had been, and she was making it clear that he probably never would be. He was a freak in the galaxy. Isolated and the product of torment.

Maybe you're right... he said. ...maybe I'll always be alone, he thought, but didn't say. He sat in silence for a moment. There was sadness in her. She hid it well, but it was there, and he knew it. The faint smile as she thought back about events of the last days, the downcast looks, and the mask of her other smiles.

He could tell that nothing he would say would keep her here, and maybe she was right. Maybe that was for the best, but he wasn't sure he believed that.

We did good, Trys, he said quietly after a moment. Even she couldn't deny it. The galaxy was a better place after what they'd done. It might have been only a fraction of a sliver of a percent of a speck better, but it was better. And to Fancy and the others, it meant everything. And it was why Talak did it. It was why he wouldn't stop.

And I owe you... he said, looking down to the floor. He owed her a lot, and some day he would find a way to pay her back. When she least expected it. He looked back up at her eyes. ...thank you.

There was a pain in his eyes that reached far beyond the eyes. For some odd reason she was right... she had cut through the walls.

 

[Trys Aran]

Mercifully, he didn’t argue back or escalate in any way. She could hear and see the defeat in him. It brought an odd pain in her that she hadn’t expected. She kept everything cool externally as always, always keeping the masks on. Trys wasn’t often shaken in her foundations, and seeing him go through the various cracks in his resolve put a few in her own.

She looked at the glass of wine, finishing it off as she smiled at it and recalled the memories. She wouldn’t forget the times here, and she wouldn’t forget Artee. For the girls, they had changed the galaxy and their entire way of life. Talak would walk one path or another, and she could only hope he would choose the right one. It was one only he could decide on, and no one else could do it for him.

Trys kept her gaze on him as he thanked her and looked down. She saw him then for what he truly was at the center of it all - a human being. He was no different than how she would have been back in her criminal days, and how she made irrational decisions. He simply had a tremendous amount of power that could cause some true damage.

She said nothing in return, and she knew it was time to leave. Trys knew they did a lot of good, and she also knew that their paths led different ways. She had her own life and world to lead, and the Flower Killer waited for her back home.

Trys moved to get up, but she surprised herself then. She had spent an eternity building up her own walls, and she was proud of them. But there was a finality to this all, and that was where her resolve cracked just a bit. She found herself moving closer to him almost without being able to think before her actions spoke for her.

While he was still looking down, her hand reached over to cup the side of his face. She tilted her own and leaned in to press her lips against his. Trys hadn’t even known that she wanted this, even just this sliver, the faintest brush against something she’d never take fully. It was her old, impulsive and brash self that pushed through her own guard. She closed her eyes and kissed him, her hand sliding up the side of his face where she felt her fingers curl slightly into his hair. She didn’t know what drove her to do this, and she didn’t question it then.

It was over as abruptly as it happened, and the warmth of his lips lingered on hers as she pulled back just slightly, “Goodbye, Talak,” She murmured softly against his lips, “I hope I never see you again.”

Without another word, she was on her feet and out the door. And out of his life.

 

[Talak Rand]

It hurt to watch her get up and walk out. She was the first person he'd reached out to in years, and now she was walking out. He would be alone again. He took a deep breath to brace himself, about to stand when she moved over toward him.

He had braced himself for her to walk out, but he hadn't braced for her to lean forward, cup her hands around his face, and kiss him. Her fingers were in his hair, and her lips were soft. He returned the kiss, welcoming it, and letting it linger on his lips. HIs hands touched her sides gently as if squeezing too hard would pop the moment like a bubble. None of the rest of it mattered. The constant internal struggles, the past, the future, the Sith Eternal, and the Sector Rangers all melted to nothing. It was just the two of them together.

And then it was shattered.

She pulled back from him and tore away the only fibers of a human connection he had in years, and those fibers tore with it pieces of the soul. I hope I never see you again, the words echoed in his mind again as she walked away. The door snapped closed, and Talak was left alone with himself.

The moment of joy and satisfaction was followed by pain, sadness, isolation, betrayal... confusion and grief. He felt as if he'd been hit in the gut and had a physical reaction that he didn't know how to process. The flood of emotions was too difficult to sort as one bled into another and washed over him in agonizing waves. He ran to the door, hoping to reach her, but she was gone. The speeder was nowhere to be seen, and she hadn't even looked back.

Don't go... the words were barely a whisper, but there was no one to hear.

You've always been too weak to save the people you care about. Why would this be any different? The same voice. Always the same voice. His only company... always alone.

//Thread