Sith Order Kitara Delarosa

Salem

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under constuction
 
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Dread

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You'll need to at least make the font size larger before I can review this. The BBCODE is a pretty big mess in this profile though, so I suggest using something simpler like the Basic Character Template. You can always play around with BBCODE in the player workshops and update the profile to a more complex template later, once you're more comfortable with how to use them.

If you really want a more complex template now, you can PM @Faster Than Light or any of the character profile mods and they may be able to help you put your profile together. Some members may have the time to offer you that as well. Otherwise, I suggest the basic template I linked above.
 

Salem

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I am sorry I did not realize the bbcode was really messy, I will change it to the basic template :)
 

MatureContentWarningx

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I'm not sure why I was tagged in this, but here are the changes that need to be made before approval is considered.
- There needs to be more context as to how she came to be a member of the SE. You have only mentioned that she joined them, this isn't enough information to decide upon her connection to them.
- The Book of the Sith is non-cannon and therefore does not exist within this particular timeline. There are also no galactically published textbooks that would describe the culture / beliefs / codes of the old Sith in enough detail for her to have found the SE or learned how to use the force.
- The Legionnaires don't really have a written code. Given that, up until this point, the SE had remained an unknown organization, it also wouldn't have been acceptable for her to have shared a 'code' or knowledge of any position she might have had within the SE with her brothers / family / friends.
- I'm okay with this particular face claim, but the way in which you've written her, seems over the top and presents to her an advantage in PVP situations when it's mentioned that her strength is greater than most of her peers. This needs to be toned down quite a bit if I'm going to approve it.

Please make the above mentioned changes and tag me again for review.
 

Salem

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MatureContentWarningx

Thank you for your insight , I think I am going to completely withdraw this character, and try something different under a new name.
 

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