Cu'bakid: Not a Game for Those With Tiny Heart Syndrome.

Loco

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So I was dicking around on the internet today, much like I always do when I'm not working or drinking, and I managed to stumble across a set of rules for the Mandalorian Game of Cu'bakid. Cu'bakid is described as a cross between Chess, Ludo, and Darts, utilizing short, sharp, double sided knives instead of traditional game pieces. It was considered a rough sport, not recommended for play non-mandalorians. Knicks, cuts, scratches, and the occasional full on stab wound are all part of the game. I'll post the brief rules here, and link to the original page which contains more information.

Credit goes to RobShanti at the WOTC forum.

DISCLAIMER -- Canon establishes that it "was recommended that non-Mandalorians not play it." Since the closest thing to Mandalorians we have on 21st Century Earth are costuming clubs, that means NO ONE ON 21st CENTURY EARTH SHOULD TRY TO PLAY THIS GAME FOR REAL! If you do, you are being STUPID, and deserve whatever ill fate the machinations of Darwinism have in store for you. The only implements 21st Century Earth players of this game should be using to simulate Cu'bikad are papers, pencils and dice, and only the imaginary characters should be the ones wielding imaginary knives. Capiche?

In-universe, the game is played using a man-sized (2 meters in diameter) Cu'bikad board, painted on or affixed vertically to a wall (as opposed to the horizontal, tabletop board used in the later, cantina-game version). Each participant dons a bandolier containing 8 knives. The pommels of one contestant's knives are black or dark-colored (matching the black/dark-colored spaces on the board) and the pommels of the other participant's knives are white or light-colored (matching the white/light-colored spaces on the board). The participants then have their secondary hands bound at the wrists (like the knife-fighters in Michael Jackson's Beat It video) and stand together 10 paces away from the board.

At the signal (the dropping of a flag, or someone yelling "Oya Manda!"), the participants run toward the board and each tries to plant his knife in a square of his own color on the outermost concentric circle of the board while simultaneously trying to prevent the other contestant from doing the same by pushing/pulling him, throwing him off balance, blocking his knife with a gauntlet (or even one's entire, armored body), parrying, etc.

When a contestant manages to plant his knife successfully, he then draws another knife and attempts to do the same in the middle concentric circle, while simultaneously trying to prevent the other contestant from doing the same.

When he succeeds in planting his knife successfully in the second concentric circle, he then attempts to plant a knife in the bull's-eye (bantha's-eye?) circle, while simultaneously trying to prevent his opponent from doing the same.

The first one to plant a knife in the bull's-eye wins.

Needless to say, this game is "rough" because people get cut and stabbed from wayward knife-strikes during play, even though the object is to stab the board, not your opponent. This is why non-Mandalorians (who, presumably, do not wear beskar'gam) are advised to avoid playing the game.

It is like darts because the ultimate objective is to pierce the bull's-eye.

It is like ludo (a version of Parcheesi) because, in Ludo, the winner is the first player to get all of their pieces onto the home square in the center of the board, and in Cu'bikad, the winner is the first to get his third knife into the bull's-eye space in the center of the board.

How is the game at all like chess, though, you ask? Well, there is this optional rule. I call it optional because you may consider the game complicated enough already and want to skip this (at least at first):

Optional Rule: If you plant a knife in a space adjacent to a space containing an opponent's knife, you may attempt to "capture" your opponent's piece (knife) by snatching it out of its space and tossing it to the ground. The opponent must now draw one of his spare knives (he has 5 spares...since this may be attempted as many times as a contestant likes) and stab a space of his color in that same concentric circle. He must plant a knife in this concentric circle before attempting to plant a knife in any smaller concentric circle.

If a contenstant runs out of knives before the bull's-eye is pierced, he loses the
contest.
cubakid.jpg

The game could also conceivably be played with a smaller board, and the 2-4 players version could also be played with a smaller board on a table, or even on a purpose built Cu'bakid board (which would probably have to be replaced/refurbished regularly).


Anyone wanna play? :bitchez
 
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Bad Wolf

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I smell Mando drinking game.....bring on the Rum!!!
 

Loco

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I smell Mando drinking game.....bring on the Rum!!!

Mandalorians + Copious Amounts of Alcohol + A game that involves rapidly stabbing a chess board with knives while simultaneously trying to prevent your opponent from doing the same while you are tied together at the wrist = Good Times.

What could possibly go wrong?
 
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Vencu

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He says we'd be di'kute to try and play it for real, but it sounds like a blast... and I can wear steel beskar'gam, so...
 

Loco

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He says we'd be di'kute to try and play it for real, but it sounds like a blast... and I can wear steel beskar'gam, so...

I've got cut resistant kevlar gloves. Close enough, right? :CHappy
 

Bad Wolf

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I have welding and blacksmithing gloves as well as a Blacksmiths apron.
 

Loco

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Well it's settled then. We all need to meet up, create a Cu'bakid board, get horrendously drunk, and stab eachother :)
 

Loco

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Johnnysaurus Rex said:
:CHappy Sigged.

lmao, that was fantastic.

I am only happy that I can amuse you in this way.


I assume it is a direct translation from Mando'a so it doesn't quite equate. I assume small hearts imply they aren't brave or courageous.

It's actually a term I picked up from a Platoon Sergeant while he yelled at my platoon. Something along the lines of;

"DON'T STOP RUNNING YOU FAGGOTS!!! WHAT THE ****S THE MATTER WITH YOU?!? YOU SUFFER TINY HEART SYNDROME?!? YOUR TINY ****ING HEART MAKES YOU WANT TO ****ING QUIT!? SHOULD I GET OUT AN X-RAY AND X-RAY YOUR TINY ****ING HEART, BECAUSE IT'S TWO SIZES TOO ****ING SMALL?!"

His enthusiasm was admirable.
 

Bad Wolf

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I have vague memories of my drill sergeant yelling something similar when we were going through the gas chamber for the 8th or 9th time.....frakking chem ops training
 

Loco

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I have vague memories of my drill sergeant yelling something similar when we were going through the gas chamber for the 8th or 9th time.....frakking chem ops training

You couldn't pay me enough to do that job. But I do believe I've heard the term used other places, so I'd guess it's another of those little known military terms...
 

Bad Wolf

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what can I say more pay and a higher security clearance then my CO, yeah I was good with that lol
 
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