Recent content by Rick Sanchez

Star Wars Episode IX: Return of the JJ (psst, JJ stands for Jar Jar)

I killed the children of the Whiterun Jarl in Skryrim, but the survivor is the brattiest one. Damn you, Bethesda.

"Hello there." - "General Kenobi. You ARE in an anthology movie now."

Accurate

Ironic. She could save others from obesity, but not herself.

I was not invited to a pool party

Why is EA the worst gaming company in America?

What's the difference between politicians and a flying pig?

Sorry, buddy, I am the Senate

Yes, we do, we have all kinds of real fake doors.

When you realize that Palpatine assassinated Julius Caesar

You are the Chancellor, but we do not grant you the rank of Senate.

Hi, I'm Ants In My Eyes Johnson, here at Ants In My Eyes Electronics Store. I mean, there's so many ants in my eyes, and there's so many TVs, microwaves, radios, I think. I'm not 100% sure what we have here in stock, because I can't see anything! Heilo there, I'm--ugh--Rick--ugh--Sanchez, I'm...